Love Undercover
by Kayla2
Summary: This story follows John and Joss's lives after An Overdue Conversation. It's helpful to read that one first (if you want). Starts off light and gets slightly more intense.
1. Chapter 1

Hi all, I'm back. I can't say goodbye to John and Joss. So, this builds on my previous story where Joss moves to Chicago and John follows her. I'm not completely sure where I'm going with this, but I have an idea. So, stick with me.

**Love Undercover**

**Chapter 1- Meeting Again For the First Time**

John and Joss sat quietly intertwined on her giant sofa. Her back rested against John's chest and their fingers were interlinked. Joss thought that if she wasn't scheduled for work the next day, she could stay in the same spot forever. And only part of it was John. Her sofa was truly amazing. After being in Chicago for all of three days of seeing multiple commercials featuring the three singing Smithe brothers, she wondered if Finch had purchased it from Walter E. Smithe or whether he'd found it in an even higher end boutique furniture store. She loved that for the first time in months, she didn't have to worry about HR or hers and Taylor's safety or compromising John in any way. Instead, she could concern herself with such inconsequential things as her new sofa.

"What are you thinking about?"

John's voice was soft but Joss could feel his chest vibrate as he spoke. The sensation made her smile.

"The sofa." Joss couldn't help laughing as soon as the truth crossed her lips.

"Ouch." John moved her away from his chest. "Are you already bored with me, Detective?" He placed his hands over his heart. "I'm wounded. Maybe you miss the suits. I remember how you used to check me out."

"Is that right?" She chuckled and flopped her back against his chest once more. "What I remember is your eyes popping out of your head when I wore a certain dress to the safe house." John smiled even though he knew Joss couldn't see the look on his face. "Did you happen to bring that dress with you to Chicago?"

John looked down at their hands. He marveled at how small Joss's hands were compared to his. He smiled as he thought about how her small frame might fool someone into thinking she wasn't absolutely fierce. Soon, her voice pulled him from his thoughts.

"You know I couldn't bring my clothes with me for safety's sake. Lucky for you, I think Finch knows what you like. " She dropped her voice to a low purr. "You'll see what my wardrobe contains when you finally take me on that date." Though they had been in Chicago together for five days, the weather had kept them inside for the entire time…not that either one of them were complaining.

"About that. We need to talk about where we go from here."

Joss's body stiffened and she immediately pulled herself away from John's embrace. "Have you changed your mind about coming here? About us?" She took a deep breath and reminded herself that she should give John a chance to speak. But before she could follow her own advice, she added, "Because if you did it's o.k."

John smiled at her. He wondered when she would get that only death would separate them…and after everything that had happened, he wasn't completely sure that death would fully keep them apart. "Jocelyn, you are stuck with me." He kissed various points on her face between each word. "Got it?"

"Got it." She smiled. "So, tell me what we need to talk about."

He pushed a strand of her hair that had fallen onto her face to its rightful place behind her ear. "Well Joss, you are very good at many things…" He leaned in as if he planned to kiss her but touched his nose to hers instead. "But lying isn't one of them."

She crinkled her nose at his statement. "That's a good thing, right?"

"It is, except you're going to make friends here. I don't want you to have to lie about how we met. You can't tell people I was a drunken bum that was brought into your precinct." John dropped his gaze. "I don't want you to."

She quickly turned her body to face him so that he could see her frowned expression. Then for extra emphasis she used her hand to force him to make eye contact. "Listen to me. You were so much more than that even then, got it?"

"Got it." His lips brushed hers softly before he pulled her back against his chest. "Still, I want to give us a better story to tell. In fact, what I want to give you is the chance for your soon-to-be friends to see how we meet from the beginning."

Joss ran what John was saying through her head. Suddenly, she began to laugh.

"What's so funny, Joss?"

She turned to look back at him. "So, you plan to stage it to look like we're meeting for the first time AND you expect people to believe that we've never met? I'm a cop, not an actress. People are going to know we've met, the first time they see our eyes meet."

John arched an eyebrow, which he punctuated with a smirk. "Why Joss, are you saying people will know you find me completely irresistible?"

"I was talking about the way you look at me." She shoved his chest causing John to fall deeper into the plush sofa. He didn't mind; the sofa felt like a cloud. He looped his arm around her shoulder, causing her to lie against his chest once more.

"So, tell me more about this genius plan of yours." Joss snuggled against his chest. She smiled as she felt him kiss the top of her head.

"I can't you're a cop not an actress. You'll be more believable if the element of surprise is there."

She released a deep sigh. "Can you at least tell me when?"

John's back stiffened. This was the moment he dreaded. He knew she was going to hate what he had to tell her.

She could always read him. At least, she could read him better than most could. "John, what's wrong?" Pulling her knee beneath her, she turned to face him.

He lifted his hand and pushed her hair behind her ear once more. Then he leaned in and kissed her gently. "I have to go away for awhile."

"Away? Where? Back to New York? For how long?"

A faint smile crossed his lips as his hand continued to linger in her hair. "I'm going on a case, Joss. That's all I'm going to tell you because I don't want to compromise you or your new position by sharing information like we used to."

Joss sat up a little straighter. She turned to face him, hoping that there would be some clue as to what he was talking about. "Compromise me? What are you talking about?"

"I don't want anyone tracing what I do back to you. It can't be like it was in New York. I won't come that close to losing you, again." He stroked her cheek while his eyes burrowed straight through hers to her soul. His intense gaze accompanied by his tensed jaw made it very clear to Joss that his decision was nonnegotiable.

"And I suppose I don't get a say in this?" Joss bristled.

"No." Immediately, John's mind flashed to Joss's crusade against HR that almost cost her life. He also thought about the way she decided to move to Chicago without talking to him. It made him bristle a bit. "_You_ of all people should understand, Joss."

She knew exactly to what he was alluding and it killed her argument. She flopped dramatically against the sofa. "When do you leave?"

"Tonight."

Joss let loose an audible sigh. "How long will you be gone?"

"I don't know. But when I get back, I'm back. I won't be leaving again unless Finch absolutely needs me." He touched his hand to her cheek, loving the way it fit perfectly in his hand. "And when we meet again, get ready to fall in love with a whole new man."

Anxious to avoid an argument on John's last day with her for a while, she refrained from articulating the thought that was screaming aloud in her mind: "What if I don't want a whole new man?"

**Eight Weeks Later**

Joss sat at her chair on the 5th floor of the Dirksen Federal Building, which was in the heart of Chicago's downtown area, known affectionately as "the loop." Somehow, she'd landed an office with a window that overlooked the courtyard below. Part of her hoped that she'd see a familiar figure in the black suit and trench coat stalking through the square, but so far she'd seen no trace of John. Not actually, that is. The truth was she had seen John in a number of people that turned out to be complete strangers.

"Do you really think you have time to be staring out of your window mooning over some lost love? Besides you're being pretty dramatic, don't cha think?"

"_You_ can't be serious. That's a little pot versus kettle isn't, it?" Joss shook her head before releasing the smile she'd been holding ever since the woman began speaking. This woman, Lena Johnson, was an attractive African-American attorney, who was about 50, but looked 30 and had deemed herself Joss's new best friend. Although Lena was no more than ten years older than Joss, she possessed more wit and wisdom than a woman of eighty.

"Not from where I'm standing. When I walked in here, I thought I walked onto the set of General Hospital with all of the brooding by the windowsill."

"Whatever Lena." Joss rolled her eyes in mock disgust. Lena was one of her wonderful new coworkers. She expected to hate practicing law; she had the first time she gave it a try. But this was different. She was making a difference here. They were taking bad men (and women) off of the streets.

It also helped that her new coworkers had incredible senses of humor and that down-to-earth approachability that seemed very common in her new hometown. Yes, she still missed John and Taylor and the rest of the men in her life, but these people made her feel at home, despite the fact that she was a stranger.

Lena walked into her office and plopped in a chair opposite Joss's desk. "We have got to find you a man so you can stop mooning over…"

"Please don't say his name."

"Yes, please don't say his name." Natalie, the office's pretty, redhead paralegal who was no more than 25, dramatically threw her hands in the air. Though the women were very different, Natalie felt completely at ease with Joss and Lena. She was never shy about giving her opinion, especially when he came to the things Joss could do to rejuvenate her love life.

"Joss," Natalie stretched out the s sound in her name, "that ship has sailed. It's time for you to move on. Go out and get your groove on. Saddle up, girl."

Joss felt the heat rise to her face. She wondered what Lena and Natalie would say the first time they saw John. Of course, at this point, she wondered if they would ever meet John. After six weeks, she'd heard from him exactly four times, one of which was Valentine's Day, when she could have sworn she heard the voices of angry men, rapidly speaking Spanish in the background. It had already been two weeks since she'd last heard from him. Joss sighed, "I'll meet someone when the time is right."

"The time is always right." Natalie retorted. "Half of the guys in this office would be willing to show you a good time if you only gave them a chance…especially, Roger."

Lena curled her lip up toward the left side of her face as she eyed Natalie suspiciously. "Sweetie, no body is thinking about Roger, but you. And he's not thinking about you. He's got his eyes on Gary."

"Shut up." Natalie snapped a Lena before breaking into a laugh. "Let's go to lunch."

Soon all three ladies were laughing until their bellies hurt. Joss loved every single second of it. While what she'd come to have with these women was different than what she had with Fusco or Finch or especially John, it still made her feel good to be connected to _something_.

The women decided to walk around the corner to the Exchequer Pub, which served some of the pizza Joss had ever had. Chicago was still freezing…even in early March. She pulled her beautiful new coat, which she found in her closet courtesy of Finch, closer to her body. They were nearing a busy crosswalk when she heard Natalie yell.

"Oh my gosh! That guy is so busy texting that he's walking into the street!"

Joss looked up just in to see a man, in grey wool coat and a newsboy cap walking blindly toward the intersection after the light had already turned red. At the same time, a cab was picking up speed less than a block away. All of Joss's training as a cop along with a double dose of adrenaline kicked in and she began running at full speed directly toward the man. While she ran, she screamed, "Sir, sir…" She could hear Lena and Natalie screaming the same in the distance.

As she ran, she noticed that neither the man nor the cab was coming to a stop. By the time she reached the man, she pulled him backward with enough force to send both of them flying to ground near the curb with the man landing on top of her. As the man lay sprawled across her body, she realized that he was much taller than she'd originally thought. The impact of hitting the ground knocked the cap off of his head and Joss noticed that his hair wasn't long, but wasn't exactly short. And finally, as the man rolled off of her she felt the slight scrape of his facial hair brush her cheek. Then, as she looked at him, behind the wire frame glasses, she saw the clear blue eyes she'd recognize anywhere. And just above a whisper, his name escaped her lips.

"John?"


	2. Chapter 2

Hi all, first and foremost, thank you for the wonderful reviews and comments I've received regarding this story. The response has been overwhelming and I'm so grateful.

Next, I have a general idea of where I'm going with this story, but for me some of the fun has been in the minutia…especially because POI didn't always focus on Joss's life outside of the team. If it feels like too much, please let me know. This chapter is kind of fun…I can't promise they will all be.

**Chapter 2 – When Will I See You Again?**

"John?" Joss's voice was barely above a whisper. There's no way that her near death experience could have been a part of his "master" first meeting plan. Could it?

"Yes." John said, his voice equally soft. "And I have to say you cut my rescue pretty close."

John moved to stand on his feet, but was knocked back on to his elbows by the sound of Joss yelling at him.

"Have you lost your mind? You could have been killed!" Joss took a deep breath. If she hadn't, she might jump on top of John and strangled him.

"I'm sorry." John stood to his feet and extended a hand in her direction. He did his best to convey with his eyes that he was sorry for more than just this plan that she pretty obviously hated, but also for the long absence that had kept him away from her. His apology was not accepted.

Joss was furious. This idiotic plan of John's could have gotten them both killed. Not to mention that seeing him after he'd been gone nearly two months, forced her to fight to keep the tears at bay. She reluctantly took John's hand. She was not at all prepared for him to yank her so quickly to her feet that she again wound up pressed against his body.

In stunned silence, Joss remained there for a second or two. At the very loud clearing of Lena's throat, she took a step back from John. The honk of a car reminded Joss that she and John were still in the street, albeit very near the curb.

"Joss," Lena said firmly as she gently pushed Joss from the curb to the corner. "I'd feel much better if you and Mr. tall, dark and handsome made your way back to the sidewalk with the rest of us."

Natalie snickered. "I'd risk getting hit by a car for some of that."

John smiled. He liked Joss's friends already. Joss, on the other hand wasn't thrilled with them at the moment. She cut her eyes, first at Natalie and then at Lena. These two were going to make it hard for her to stay angry with John. And he wasn't helping things by standing there looking absolutely adorable. Her anger was renewed when she saw the smudges of dirt on her a beautiful new coat.

An awkward silence fell over the four. John broke it.

"Hi, I'm John Reagan."

He extended his hand toward Joss for her to shake it. She did not. However, Lena and Natalie took turns grasping it quickly enough to spare him any embarrassment.

John directed his attention to Joss once more. "And you are?"

Joss had no intention to make things easy on John, not after that stunt. "Late for lunch." Her voice was razor sharp.

"Her name is Joss…Joss Taylor " Natalie offered up quickly and received a glare from Joss. Are you single?"

John laughed out loud. "I am. Is Joss…Joss Taylor?"

Now, it was Lena's turn to volunteer information, "She is-"

"Not interested," Joss cut her off. "At least, I'm not interested in a man who is willing to risk his life to send a text message."

Joss turned and began to walk away from John while hundreds of questions ran through her mind. The recue was obviously a set up. So, how long had John been in town? It was long enough that he had become familiar with her work schedule. Why hadn't he contacted her when he returned from wherever he'd been? And just where had he been? She wasn't going to go along with this stupid plan until she got answers.

She could hear her friends apologizing to John for her behavior and she didn't care. As she quickened her pace, she knew that she'd have to spend her entire lunch hour explaining her seeming overreaction to John to both Nat and Lena, but she didn't care. The truth of the matter was that she was fairly certain that she wasn't actress enough to make nice with John in front of her friends.

Joss reached the door of the Exchequer Pub before her friends. She was immediately comforted by the dimly lit interior and the interior that had become familiar to her over the last couple of months. She readied herself for the sounds of Lena's and Natalie's voices telling her what an idiot she was for letting John go. It was John's voice that surprised her instead.

"If I didn't know better, Joss, I'd think you weren't interested." John wore the smile of the Cheshire cat. Joss wanted to knock it off of his face. However, Lena and Natalie were standing a few feet away at the bar area with both pairs of eyes pinned on them.

She spoke to him through clinched teeth. "At the moment, I'd like to wring your neck for a variety of reasons."

"I'm happy to let you have your way with me." He paused to allow her smile. He knew it would happen after that line…and it did. "But I think it's only appropriate that it happen behind closed doors."

Joss laughed out loud, even though it made hate herself a little. John responded by smiling at her. He loved that she'd been able to settle into what seemed like a good life in Chicago. Lena and Natalie soon joined them.

"So handsome, what did you say to her that finally got her to smile?" Lena asked. Joss loved Lena, but she was as nosy as could be.

"Nothing much." John winked at Joss. "But I was about to remind her that an old Chinese proverb says that once you save a life you are responsible for it."

Joss smiled. "Unfortunately, Mr. Reagan, that's not really a Chinese proverb, it's a line from Star Wars."

John laughed out loud exposing a few laugh lines that Joss only got to see during the best of their times together before. There was something about him that seemed so relaxed now. She wondered what had changed with him.

"I'm going to love finding out how you know that. Which leads me to the reason I took the lovely Lena up on her off to join you for a few minutes, even though I can't stay for lunch." He directed his attention toward Joss. "I'd like to take you to dinner to say thank you for saving my life."

"She'd love to." Natalie answered before Joss could. "How about Friday night?"

Lena shook her head. "Un, un. How about tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow it is." John spoke quickly, before Joss could protest. "Now I should be going. I have a department meeting to attend."

"A department meeting?" Joss raised an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah, John is a professor of linguistics at the University of Chicago." Natalie patted his arm. "We found that out while you were having your tantrum."

Joss rolled her eyes at both her friends as she silently wondered when they'd left her side and become TeamJohn. She was still annoyed…and her coat still had a smudge. "And just what kind of text would be so important that a linguistics professor would be willing to risk injury while sending it?"

John began to get up from the table. He leaned very close to Joss's ear. With a husky voice, he said, "I'll tell you tomorrow."

John turned to leave and Joss placed her hand on his arm to stop him. They both felt the electricity between them immediately. Now it was Joss's voice that became husky. "Don't you need my number?" There was no point in going this far and blowing it.

Lena, not John responded, "Oh honey, Natalie and I took care of that already."

**The next evening.**

"You can't wear that. It's not cute enough." Natalie gave Joss the once over in her very sensible brown dress and high boots.

"Natalie!" Joss shook her head. She could not believe what regularly came out of her friend's mouth.

"She's right." Lena said in quick agreement. "Where's your closet?"

Joss fought back a grin. She knew she was about to become the envy of her girlfriends. Without a word, she walked to the rear of her bedroom and opened the door that led to an endless walk-in closet. Lena and Natalie released audible gasps as they took hesitant steps, slowed by amazement toward the closet.

Lena and Natalie began searching through Joss's closet in what reminded Joss of a slow-motion sequence from a movie. They oohed and ahhed and pulled out dresses and twirled in them. Soon, she heard Lena exclaim, "Oh my gosh, girl. You have this and you're wearing that?"

"Seriously Joss, this dress is so perfect." Natalie was the first to emerge from the closet holding the dress in front of her.

Honestly, Joss hadn't seen a quarter of the gorgeous dresses Finch had layered in the closet. Sure, she would visit the front of the closet to pick through the beautiful suits and jackets and coats and shoes, so many shoes, that she would wear to work. But, she'd only made it to the very front of the place where the dresses were. Even from the front of the dresses, she could see a multitude colors and an occasional shimmer. And of course, there was plenty of elegant black. But Joss found that each attempt to delve into the full expanse of the closet was overwhelming.

So, when Natalie held against her, this most beautiful, black cocktail dress that looked like bands of fabric willed together by a master seamstress or a genie, Joss did her best to keep her draw from dropping. She wanted to reach out and touch the translucent shoulders and sleeves, just to feel the weight of the fabric, but it wouldn't make sense. Her will power shriveled when Joss got close enough to see the Versace label inside of the dress; her breath hitched a little.

"Girl, why are you acting like you're seeing this dress for the first time?"

_Think fast, Joss, _ her mind screamed. She released a sigh before giving the best explanation she could. "It's just that this dress is for special occasions and John didn't mention where he was taking me."

"No worries. He told us. Go change." Natalie shoved her in the bathroom. She continued talking through the door. "So Joss, spill. Where did you get all of these beautiful clothes?"

Good question. "My ex—" Joss started to reference Finch as her ex-employer, but that would simply raise more questions. Lucky for her, she didn't have to finish.

Lena interrupted. "Never mind, we aren't trying to hear about that ex of yours tonight. In fifteen minutes, Mr. tall, dark, beautiful and gainfully employed is going to pick you up. You're going to be ready for him. And I don't just mean physically, I mean mentally. No more baggage. And do you know, why?"

"Why?" Joss called through the door.

"Because I have worked downtown for 15 years and I've never had a man that looked or acted like that fall on me. So, you are going to go out and have a good time, not just for you but for all of the women in the city of Chicago."

Joss burst out laughing before emerging from the bathroom.

"Wow." The women said at the same time. "You look amazing."

Joss almost started to cry. She hadn't had girl time like this since she and her sister were kids. She'd missed this. The closest she'd come to this before she left New York was when she and Zoe and Shaw went undercover at Blur. That was an assignment. These were her friends.

Natalie smacked her hands on her hips. "Get it together, sister. We still need to do your hair and makeup." All three women laughed.

Fourteen and a half minutes later, Joss's hair hung in soft curls around her shoulders. Her big, brown eyes were dressed in a hint of color. And her feet stood on four and ½ inch stiletto heels.

The doorbell rang. Lena insisted that Natalie and Joss head to the bedroom so that Joss could make an entrance. They giggled as they heard Lena fawn all over John until they finally heard Lena call Joss's name.

John wasn't ready to see Joss. He thought he was, but when he saw her, his heart stopped. Time stopped. He'd always thought she was beautiful, but there was something different about her tonight. She was still Joss, but she was more: she was his future. From behind his back, John pulled three long stemmed roses: two yellow and one red.

John handed each of the yellow roses to Joss's friends. He said softly, "I don't think I could have done this without either of you." He stepped forward to hand the red rose to Joss. The plan was to tell her she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, but his voice betrayed him. He was only able to nod in response to her soft thank you.

Joss fared no better. It was never lost on her, or any other woman, what an attractive man John was. But as he stood before her in a tux, he looked so distinguished…particularly with his glasses and the light beard. They just stood there for a minute staring at each other.

Lena cleared her throat. "You two should get going."

John and Joss were on their way out of the door about to begin their first date when Lena caught John by the arm. She whispered quietly and quickly, "Look John, tread carefully with Joss. She's had a hard time getting over an ex."

The guilt rose to John's throat. He knew Joss was hurt by his absence but he planned to make it up to her. He was glad she had made friends who cared so much for her. "I promise."

"And if she even mentions the name Ian Murphy, you change the subject. She will tell you how wonderful he is, but he abandoned her in Chicago. As far as I'm concerned, it's a good thing she's done with him."

John suddenly had the urge to hit something or someone…namely Ian Murphy. A million thoughts ran through his mind as he wondered if Ian had followed Joss to Chicago. It wouldn't make sense to let Lena read his expression. So, John leaned down and kissed Lena's cheek. "Don't worried Lena, I plan to make Joss forget she ever heard that name."

(To see the dress, Google: Versace long sleeve cocktail dress. It's the second dress.)


	3. Chapter 3

Hi all, I can't believe it's been a year since I watched POI and almost as long since I updated. I'm so sorry for my lengthy absence. The muse abandoned me. I hope you are still interested in reading. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving everyone.

Chapter 3- Pleasant Diversions

Joss's eyes widened as she saw the limousine parked in front of her building. Unless Finch was driving the limo, this certainly was a new John. John Reese preferred to move in the shadows, while John Reagan showed up at her door with gifts for her friends, before whisking her off for a night on the town. She half-expected the limo driver who was standing at the opened door to be her old friend, Harold Finch, but as she got closer to the car, she realized she didn't know the man who drove this car.

John enjoyed the view as he watched Joss get into the car and then he followed her inside. She turned her head and smiled at him shyly. Such a simple gesture and yet, it made his heart race. Joss's hand slid over John's and she wrapped her pinky and ring finger around his pinky. It made him smile.

"So, are you going to tell me where we're going?" Her voice was soft.

"Navy Pier."

"Dressed like this?" She furrowed her brows. From what she'd heard from her friends and co-workers, Navy Pier was an amusement park. John was taking her to an amusement park in Versace?

"Yes." He laughed out loud.

"It's not even 30 degrees outside and you're taking me to an amusement park?"

"Relax Jocelyn. I'm taking you to a gala for the Boys and Girls Clubs."

"Oh." The use of her full name threw Joss for a loop. For a moment, she tried to recall when John had ever done that before. When she noticed that John was smirking at her, she leaned back in a quiet huff.

As the car moved along the brightly lit city streets, Joss wondered how John had decided on a fundraiser as their first date. She would have been content to go to a quiet restaurant where they could sit in a dimly lit corner, hold hands and talk about their lives over the last month. A gala would be loud and crowded. After two months, all Joss wanted was some quiet time with John. Maybe he was working a case.

"What's the matter, Joss?" John raised an eyebrow. He ached to ask her whether Ian's dates were lower key, but he didn't want to put a damper on their evening. "You don't like fancy parties?"

"I do." Joss frowned ever so slightly. "I was just hoping we would go someplace where we'd be able to talk."

"There will be plenty of time to talk, Joss. I promise." Talking was exactly what John didn't want to do, except for finding out more about what Murphy was doing in Chicago. He took her hand and interlaced his fingers with hers. It was ironic to find such tiny, delicate fingers on such a strong, passionate woman. "Tonight, you're mine and for the first time, the whole world around me gets to know it. Can we just enjoy each other for just a few hours?"

With a slight nod in agreement, Joss settled in against John's shoulder. They rode in a comfortable silence for the 10 minutes it took to get from her house to Navy Pier in light traffic.

When they arrived, John helped Joss out of the car while he enjoyed the view of her beautiful legs. His heart raced a little as she tucked her arm in his. Tonight, Jocelyn would be his date. He would introduce Joss to the new friends he'd made, while they were apart, even if he knew it would only cause her to ask more questions.

Joss's eyes widened when she saw the Grand Ballroom. Light and color flooded the room. It reminded her of being inside a kaleidoscope. Beautiful orchid arrangements seem to spring from the center of the tables. And there were so many people. There were lots of kids who were about Taylor's age or younger.

"Mr. Reagan!"

For a moment, Joss didn't realize that the teen attached to the voice was referring to John. When the realization hit her, it revved up her curiosity.

"Hey Anthony." John broke into a genuine smile.

The two embraced in a half-hug that displayed their warm feelings and also highlighted their masculinity; something Joss was sure was important to this Anthony kid. He reminded her a bit of Taylor. She wondered how long John had known him.

"Is this the lady you were telling me about?" Anthony gave Joss an obvious once of over. "Niiiiice. I gotta give it to you, Mr. R., you weren't playing. Your woman is beautiful. Wait until DeShawn and Wayne see her." The kid continued to smile in appreciation as Joss looked on uncomfortably.

John chuckled at both Joss and Anthony's reactions. "She is beautiful. And like I told you, she saved my life…after you texted me at an inopportune time."

"I'll have to wait and see if that was a wise decision," Joss deadpanned.

John looked at Joss with hooded eyelids that oozed sex-appeal. "I promise to prove just how wise a decision it was, Jocelyn…as many times as you need me to."

Joss had to fan herself; she couldn't help it. The heat quickly rose to her face. She didn't even realize she was fanning herself until she heard Anthony tell John he was the man, which was followed by the two fist-bumping. Joss cleared her throat loudly enough to cause John to chuckle and to cause Anthony to say his good-byes.

John led them to their table. He wanted desperately for Joss to see that being connected to these kids was important to him; although, he knew that this also would lead to more questions.

As they approached the table and Joss saw several suited men and their dates, she half-expected Finch to be one of the men and for Zoe or Shaw to be one of their dates. But as John began to introduce her to some of their tablemates, Finch and crew were nowhere to be found. And strangely John again seemed to know a couple of the men and a couple of the women. There was Patrick from his basketball league. She couldn't believe John was in a basketball league. And Armand and Carol who were a "fellow academics," from the University of Chicago. Each appeared to be relatively normal, as did each of their spouses.

John knew this would be a lot for Joss to take in. He wished he could have thought of another way to introduce her to the new him, but this seemed the most logical. And yet, he knew that the way he had handled things could cause her to walk away from him. Her distant gaze and one-word answers had him worried. In fact, Joss was noticeably quiet until the evening's main honoree, Anthony Montgomery, whom she had met earlier, began to speak.

Anthony told how he'd been raised on the rough side of town. His dad had been killed when he was younger and his mother was typically at work when he came home from school in the afternoons. The gangs began to target him as a recruit from the time he was in fifth grade. It was then that he learned about the Boys and Girls Club. It gave him a place to go afterschool until his mom got home. His neighborhood was riddled with gangs and other dangerous situations. His buddies DeShawn and Wayne told him about the Boys and Girls Club. After a while, he decided to check it out.

For the first six years that he was involved in the Boys and Girls clubs, he was taken under the wing of a volunteer named, Andre Booker. Mr. Booker was the boxing instructor at the local gym. He taught Anthony how to handle himself in tough situations. Then violence hit. Mr. Booker was shot in gang-crossfire. Anthony began to worry each day that he might never make it to his high school graduation let alone attend college. Then a few weeks ago, Mr. Reagan showed up. And he was another adult who was willing to listen.

Joss absorbed the words Anthony was saying. Could John have actually been back in Chicago for "a few weeks" and have managed to only call her once?

Anthony continued to give a very moving speech. He mentioned how Mr. Reagan was beginning to teach him to box and how he didn't know what he would have done if Mr. Reagan hadn't come along.

Joss leaned and whispered in John's ear. "Should I be jealous of this new bromance?"

John smiled broadly. "He's a good kid."

Soon, Anthony's speech concluded. His words were met by a standing ovation from the attendees. He beamed with pride.

The scene threatened to make Joss emotional. Anthony reminded her so much of Taylor. She missed her son so much. Part of her wondered if she was being overly cautious by moving to a new city, prohibiting visits from Taylor and forcing him and her mother to use burner phones to contact her. But she would not be able to withstand anything happening to her family because of her war with HR.

John could see that something was making Joss wistful. He suspected she was missing her son. He gave her hand a small squeeze and silently prayed for a distraction. His prayer was soon answered when a DJ took his place near the dance floor. In clichéd fashion, the DJ began to play Celebration by Kool and the Gang.

Joss watched in a mixture of horror and amazement…and then with simple glee as benefactor after benefactor, including all of their tablemates, made their way to the dance floor. Each person seemed to move to his or her own beat and yet, they were all so happy and carefree. She and John could be that carefree, now that John was back and they didn't have to worry about HR…for at least the next year or so.

Joss flipped her hair over her shoulder and turned to John. "Care to join them?"

John smirked. "I think I'll sit this one out."

Joss began to grin like the Cheshire cat. Then she practically purred, "Don't tell me, I've finally stumbled on the one thing John Ree…Reagan doesn't do well."

"What I don't do well, Jocelyn is cheesy. I'll be right back."

John made his way to the DJ. Joss watched as the DJ and John looked through a bin of records and then at a digital screen. Apparently, John had something specific in mind. He made his way back to the table and sat beside Joss.

"So, are you going to tell me which song you requested?"

"Good things come to those who wait, Jocelyn." John's words rolled slowly off of his tongue.

"I'll remind you that you said that later tonight."

A moment later, Joss heard a familiar, soulful melody fill the air. If she was hearing correctly the song was "You're All I Need to Get By" by Marvin Gaye and Tammy Terrell. Joss gasped audibly. "John, you know Marvin Gaye?"

He smiled. Rising to his feet, he extended his hand before making his request. "Dance with me?"

Joss raised an eyebrow. John was asking her to dance to a song with an upbeat tempo that he requested. She knew him well enough to know that he wouldn't embarrass himself. But this was quite a soulful song.

"Come on, Joss, they're playing our song.

As the two began to dance, Joss marveled at the way John could move. She began to smile and shake her head as she began to wonder what this man couldn't do. Then she remembered John had called this their song. She began to process the words.

Like sweet morning dew, I took one look at you

And it was plain to see you were my destiny

With arms open wide I threw away my pride

I'll sacrifice for you, dedicate my life to you

I will go where you lead, always there in time of need

And when I lose my will you'll be there to push me up the hill

There's no, no looking back for us

We got love sure enough, that's enough

You're all, you're all I need to get by

You're all I need to get by

Like an eagle protects his nest, for you I'll do my best

Stand by you like a tree and dare anybody to try and move me

Darling in you I found strength where I was torn down

Don't know what's in store but together we can open any door

Just to do what's good for you and inspire you a little higher

I know you can make a man out of a soul that didn't have a goal

'Cause we, we got the right foundation and with love and determination

You're all, you're all I want to strive for and do a little more

You're all, all the joys under the sun wrapped up into one

Before the song was over, Anthony and a bunch of other boys surrounded John. Each gave him high fives, fist bumps and congratulations on his moves. Joss smiled as she watched this new side of John.

The evening came to a close and John helped Joss into the limousine once more to head back to her place. She rested her head on his shoulder as she enjoyed the sensation of having him close once more. She had so many questions about where he had been and what he had been up to. Yet, she knew he didn't want to talk about it by the venue he'd chosen for their date.

When they arrived at the apartment building, Joss noticed that as John walked her to her door, the limo remained. He stopped in the building's entryway.

"Aren't you coming in?" Joss tried not to sound disappointed. A chill, caused by the frigid temps and the snow covered steps, shot up her arm and she began to shiver. Instinctively, John began to rub her arms to help her warm up.

"Why Jocelyn, I didn't take you for a sex on the first date kind of girl." John practically purred.

Because she was slightly embarrassed, she added, "I meant, aren't you coming inside to your apartment?"

John dropped his head. "I don't live here, anymore."

"You moved? When? Where are you living now?" Somehow John managed to raise more questions at the end of their date than at the beginning.

John remained silent. He seemed to be searching for the words.

Joss remembered John's earlier request to just have a nice evening. So, instead of arguing or asking the questions that he clearly didn't want to answer tonight, she brought her hand to his cheek, stood on her tiptoes and gave him a soft kiss. When he moved to deepen the kiss, she took a step back.

"Remember John, good things come to those who wait." Joss tilted her head to the side and smiled. "I had a lovely evening Mr. Reagan. I expect you to call me soon?"

"Count on it," John smiled. He knew Joss was putting the breaks on until she could get answers. While he knew she wouldn't like the answers she was seeking; he knew there was no way around telling her what she needed to know. As he made his way back to the limo, his heart was filled with happiness…and dread.


	4. Chapter 4

Hi all, I know I haven't updated in a REALLY long time, but I'm back. I hope you are still interested in this story. I'll try to update more frequently (of course, more frequently doesn't set the highest bar.) Thank you everyone for inquiring about whether I was going to continue. It means so much that anyone wants to read what I write. Anyhow, I hope you enjoy.

Love Undercover – Chapter 4

Joss walked into the Dirksen building the morning after her date with John, feeling like she was floating on cloud 9. After all of their starts and near misses, it looked like they were actually going to happen. It felt surreal. Her whole new life felt surreal. And yet, as soon as she walked onto her office floor, her inner detective was immediately on alert. Two things immediately struck her as odd: 1) People were staring at her as she walked through the door and 2) Natalie and Lena weren't waiting to ambush her at the elevator.

She wondered if the FBI had paid a visit to tell her that Quinn's trial was moving forward faster than expected or worse, that he was going to go free. What if something had happened to Taylor? Or Fusco? As the thoughts ran through her mind, her feet picked up speed. What if the FBI, CIA or an unnamed agency found out about Finch and the machine or John? Soon, her only goal was o make it to her office so that she could make what ever calls or emergency plan was necessary. As she flung the door open, what she saw stopped her in her tracks.

The room was filled with flowers: roses, tulips, daisies and daffodils. The room also held Lena and Natalie who were smiling from ear to ear.

While Joss was still speechless, Lena stood and gave her the once over. "Well, Miss Thing what did YOU do on your date last night?"

Natalie chimed in, "And what did you make John for breakfast this morning?"

Joss found herself blushing at the implications. "John and I went to a charity benefit last night."

"We knew that. Get to the good stuff." Natalie demanded.

Joss decided to play coy. "Good stuff?"

"Yeah, like what did you do to that man to make him fill your office with flowers and send bouquets to me and Lena?"

"John sent you guys flowers, too. Aw." Joss went to her desk and flopped in her chair. She straightened up as she realized that John had just caused her to swoon. Only John. "Ladies, I swear I was a girl scout." She put up two fingers to punctuate her point. The two women stared at her as if to demand she tell some secret she wasn't telling. Joss began laughing at the expression on their faces.

"Seriously, I only gave him a quick kiss."

Lena raised an eyebrow, "Mouths opened or closed."

"Closed." Joss felt like she was in high school. She always had trouble dishing the dirt on her personal life because she tended to be a private person, it's probably part of the reason she and John clicked the way they had early on.

Natalie leaned over to Lena and "whispered" loud enough for Joss to hear, "He did this for a kiss? What's he going to do when she spends the night? Buy her a damn Mercedes?"

Joss laughed out loud and was joined in laughter by Lena and Natalie. The three continued to laugh until they were interrupted by the sound of the phone ringing.

"Hello."

"Hello Jocelyn."

The purr of John's voice had an immediate and sobering effect on Joss. Instantly, she could feel the heat rise from her neck to her face. Once again she felt like she was in high school. "Hi John."

Lena and Natalie sang in unison, "Hi John."

John chuckled. "I take it that you received the flowers."

"Yes. And so did Natalie and Lena."

"Thank you, John." Natalie and Lena sang in unison.

Joss smiled. "How many florists did you empty?"

"Less than a dozen." He laughed. She loved to hear him laugh.

Joss did her best to regain her "professional" composure. "Well, if you were trying to ensure the creation of the John Reagan fan club you have succeeded."

"I'm glad they liked the flowers. Did you have a nice time last night?"

Joss wanted to tell John how much she enjoyed herself and ask a few questions about his new life, but she wanted to do so without an audience. "Hang on a second John, let me see if I can get a moment of privacy." Joss made faces at Lena and Nat and pointed to the door as an overt gesture that they should leave. However, it seemed they got more comfortable. Joss shook her head and smiled. "It seems your groupies are refusing to go."

"Then why don't we have dinner tonight…at my place, so we can talk in private."

"I'd like that."

"I'll pick you up at 7?"

"It's a date." Joss was smiling so hard her cheeks started to hurt. As soon as she hung up the phone, Natalie and Lena let out loud squees.

"It's a date? As in tonight?" Natalie asked.

Joss nodded. Only John could make her down right giddy. And for the first time, she could actually show it.

"What are you going to wear?" Lena was already racking her brain.

Before Joss could answer, Natalie said, "She's going to wear red. It's been shown to lead to long lasting relationships. There's a red cashmere sweater about four hangers in. You also have some leather pants."

"Leather pants?" Finch had bought her leather pants? Joss was going to have a tough time reconciling Finch buying her leather pants. Still, it would great to see John's face with she told him they were a gift from Finch.

"Yes, they're really high end. That ex of yours sure had great taste. Wear those and the black high heeled boots. "

Joss was shocked. "Natalie! Did you memorize my closet in the two minutes you were in there?"

"Yes. I knew you would need the help."

Lena nodded thoughtfully. "She's right you, know."

"Very funny. Do I get a say in the matter?"

Natalie and Lena answered at the same time. "No."

After a very long day at work, Joss made it home with just a few minutes to spare. Still, when she'd finished dressing, Joss couldn't help calling Finch, especially after she saw how the leather pants hugged each and every curve on her lower body. The choice was so not-Finch. She held the phone to ear as she applied her make-up.

"Hi Harold, how are you?"

"I'm good Joss. " Bear barked in the background at the sound of Joss's name. "Someone misses you here."

Joss laughed. "Give Bear a scratch behind the ears from me. I miss him."

"He misses you too, Joss. In fact, I think he'd be inconsolable if Taylor didn't visit him as often as he does."

Joss smiled broadly, "I'm glad they have each other." Thoughts of Taylor sobered her. "Finch, is Taylor really OK? He tells me he's fine when we talk and he looks ok on video, but—"

"But you're his mother and you worry. I understand Jocelyn, but you don't have to worry; Taylor is doing as well as he tells you he is doing. You've raised quite a remarkable young man, Joss. "

Tears welled in Joss's eyes. She missed him so much.

A few silent seconds passed before Harold spoke, "So Joss, is there anything I can do for you?"

As she remembered the reason she'd called Finch, she chuckled out loud. "Oh Harold, I called to thank you again for all of the clothes. You have made me the envy of all of my friends."

"After all that you've done for us, I figured it was the very least that I could do."

"You are a man full of surprises, Harold." She peaked over her shoulder and looked at her rear view in the mirror. "I never took you for the kind of man to like leather pants on a woman." She couldn't stop herself from giggling.

Finch's discomfort was practically tangible through the phone. "Actually, Det.—Joss, Ms. Shaw picked those out. She thought your new move would give you an opportunity to spice up your wardrobe. I assured her that your classic styling needed no alteration. But she insisted."

"Thanks for the compliment, Harold, but I suppose we can all stand a change from time to time. "

Joss's doorbell rang.

"Gotta go, Harold. John is here to pick me up for our date."

"Enjoy yourself, Jocelyn. And please give Mr. Reese my regards."

"Will do. Bye Harold " Joss hung up. She yelled toward the door, "Coming." On her way to the door, she stopped by the mirror and shook out her curls until they lay just right on her shoulder.

Joss opened the door to find John wearing a black pea coat, blue jeans and loafers. He held his hands behind his back. He was also wearing wire-rimmed glasses that somehow made him look even sexier than normal. Plus, she wasn't certain she'd ever seen him in jeans.

"Hi." Joss said softly.

John was unable to respond. Somehow, she had stolen his breath and his voice right along with it. She was absolutely gorgeous. Her coloring did wonders for the red sweater. And the leather pants drew every impure thought he'd ever had about her to the forefront of his mind. He decided to improvise. He pulled a dozen red roses from behind his back.

"More flowers, John? There's not going to be a rose left in the city by the time you get done."

The lilt in her voice made them both laugh.

"I'm just playing catch up."

"Catch up?" Joss raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, catch up from the first time I wished I could send you flowers. I couldn't send you flowers in New York because I had to live in the shadows, which meant I couldn't tell you how I felt about you. You were a cop and I was a wanted to man. And so, I couldn't be open with the way I felt about you." He moved closer to her and placed his hands on her hips. " And now I can. Those flowers are a celebration of our fresh start."

"Fresh start. I like that." She ran her arms up his arm. "And by the way, you're still very much a wanted man."

In response, John leaned down and kissed her gently. He rested his forehead against hers. "Have I told you how amazing you look?

"Not yet." Joss smiled.

"You look absolutely amazing, Jocelyn Taylor." He kissed her forehead and took a step back. "Why don't you grab your coat so we can start our very romantic evening? Otherwise, if we don't leave soon, I'm not going to want to leave here before the morning."

Joss felt the blush rise to her cheeks. She moved toward the hall closet. She was all too aware that John's eyes hadn't left her backside. "I'm going to have to wear leather pants more often."

"I really like the leather pants."

Joss giggled as she put on her coat. "Do you know I actually thought Finch bought them?"

"Harold?" John forced himself to smile.

"Yeah, I could practically hear him blushing through the telephone when I asked him about them. It turns out Shaw bought them. I'm sure Harold will tell you all about our conversation when you talk to him." She reached for the doorknob and opened the door.

"Wait." John pushed the door closed. This was the conversation he had been dreading. His hands felt clammy, so he shoved them in his pockets. Now was as good of a time as any to tell her. "I won't be talking to Harold."

Joss looked at John. She was slightly confused. "Well no, I don't expect you to talk to him tonight."

He took her hands in his. "I'm not sure how to tell you this Joss, so I'm just going to say it. I've ended my association with Harold. I'm ready to have a life. I'm done working the numbers. "


	5. Chapter 5

_Hi all. Thanks so much for the kind reviews. They made me try to work faster to get this chapter done. Anyhow, I hope you enjoy this chapter. John and Joss have a lot of stuff to work out and much of it comes out during this chapter. Hopefully, Joss will be able to see where John is coming from with some of his current life choices. Hope you enjoy._

**Chapter 5**

"I'm done working the numbers." John's voice said the words but Joss could barely believe what she was hearing. "Finch has found a replacement and I have distanced myself from him for his own protection."

Joss leaned against the door struck by the blow of John's words. John had actually said he was done with the numbers. Done forever? Or was he just taking a break? Could he even take a break? What was he protecting Finch from?

John prided himself on being good at reading people, but the expression on Joss's face was completely blank. "Jocelyn, say something."

She placed her hand against John's chest as she tried to find the right words. Giving up the numbers wasn't something John would do without giving it serious thought. And he certainly had earned the right to take time off if he chose to.

"Jocelyn?"

"I'm sorry." Even the way John called her Jocelyn instead of Joss or Carter still threw her. She pushed out a breath of air. "It's just a lot to take in."

"That's why I wanted to take you to the Boys and Girl's Club fundraiser. I wanted you to see that I could continue to make a difference in people's lives without giving up my own. Kids like Anthony need me, too."

John leaned against the door next to Joss invading a little more of her space. "I didn't mean to just spring this on you. And I don't want to ruin our date, but I really feel like giving up the numbers is something I have to do and I just want to be honest with you." John looked down at his feet.

Joss touched his forearm. This was obviously a very tough decision for John and she wanted to be supportive. Still, she had to know that he had thought things through. That he wasn't doing this because he thought it was something he thought he needed to do for her. "Are you sure? Because I don't need you to do this for us to be-"

Before she could finish her sentence, John pressed his lips to hers. It was a tender kiss meant simply to comfort and reassure. After a moment, he broke the kiss, but allowed his hand to remain on her cheek where it had come to rest. "I'm sure. I'm doing this for me as much as I'm doing this for us. I'm tired. I know the difference my work makes, but I'm not a young man. There are things that I think about, that I want. I want to love you in the way a man loves a woman, openly, proudly. I want to have a life and a family. I want us."

John leaned down once more and gently brushed his lips against hers once more. In response, she snaked her arms around his neck and allowed him to deepen the kiss. If a life was what John really wanted, he deserved it. He'd given too much of himself to others his entire life to feel selfish for wanting something for himself. She tried to show him that she would support anything he wanted by pouring all of her love and understanding into the kiss. Soon, a slight moan escaped her lips causing John to smile and pull back a bit.

"Jocelyn, if we don't leave now, we might not make it back to my house." He kissed the tip of her nose.

She sighed loudly, "Would that be so bad?"

"No, but I really want you to see my place." John's eyes danced and for a minute, he reminded Joss of a boy on Christmas morning.

"Then let's go."

John and Joss walked hand in hand to the parking garage near Joss's building. Joss remained quiet. She was still trying o wrap her mind around a world without John Reese, vigilante. They arrived at his car, a navy blue Toyota Camry Hybrid. She wondered if John wanted to become boring. It was a simple, environmentally conscious car, which was good…just not particularly exciting.

No more than ten minutes later, they arrived on quiet street in a neighborhood known as the Wrigleyville, also home to their home town baseball team. John pulled through a back ally and before long, into a garage. Joss's eyes brightened as soon as she saw the Ducati motorcycle in the garage. Even though he drove a hybrid, this was proof that John was still John. As John moved to the side garage door, Joss headed straight for the bike.

"Is this the 1098s?" Joss had spent hours when John was gone reading and web-surfing about Ducatis. Focusing on the bikes made her feel closer to John when he was gone. It reminded her of a time when she only knew him as an unnamed vigilante whom she would only see ghosting off on that gorgeous black bike. This one was a little different. From what Joss could tell, John's old bike was a Streetfighter and it was solid black. This bike had hints of red. And from all of the research she'd done, this bike was fast, maybe the tenth fastest in the world.

"It is." He smiled. Jocelyn Taylor was full of surprises. At that moment he wondered if there was any way she could be more perfect for him. He watched her for a moment as she ran her hands along the bike. And then silently, he moved behind her.

"Will you take me for a ride when it gets warmer?" She jumped as she turned to find him standing not even an inch away from her.

John's voice was deep and flirty as he replied, "I'll give you a ride whenever you want."

Joss tried to hide the chill that ran up her spine and the heat that flooded her face. She pushed his chest playfully. "Why don't you show me your house first?"

He laughed and extended his hand, which she took. Immediately, outside of the detached garage they walked through a beautiful patio area with a stone walkway and canopies adorned by lights.

"John, this is so beautiful. I bet it looks amazing when the furniture covers are off and the lights are on."

The patio had been a big selling point for John. "I think Taylor will love bringing a study group here next fall. But feel free to invite Nat and Lena over for cocktails when it gets warmer. "

"You're making plans for Taylor to be here?" She asked softly.

He turned to face her. "I hope I didn't overstep."

She gave his hand a gentle squeeze. "Not at all. It means a lot to me."

John led Joss through the house, which turned out to be an actual house and not an apartment as she had expected. It was a converted three-flat. Everywhere the eye could see, there were hardwood floors that were buffed to a dangerous shine. The dining room and kitchen were on the second floor and would obviously be flooded by sunlight during the day. There were also three very large bedrooms that were elegantly decorated and that had a number of pillows on top of each of the beds.

And there was a fourth smaller bedroom next to the master bedroom that was decorated in pink and grey. On the grey wall there was a mural of a large tree with pink and white blossoms. There were airy white curtains framing the windows. John had been drawn to the room when he first looked at the house. The previous owners had offered to paint it before he moved in, but he declined. For some reason he was attached to the room. For a second when he looked at the room he pictured himself holding a mocha-skinned little girl in the air and laughing while she giggled and cooed. He watched as Jocelyn looked at the room with confusion etched on her face. Soon, he took her hand and led her back to the kitchen.

Joss sat on a stool that was in front of the kitchen island as John moved from the fridge to the stove. She nursed a glass of red wine as he cooked. Now that John's coat had been removed, she could see that he wore a simple navy blue sweater that had three buttons near the neckline. She was amazed that his moves were as fluid in the kitchen as they were when he was engaged in battle.

"What are you making us for dinner?"

"Pepper crusted steak with truffle butter, garlic mashed potatoes and asparagus."

Joss smiled. "That sounds amazing."

"I think you'll leave here satisfied." John smirked.

"You are shameless, John Reagan." Joss chuckled. "Hey, why did you pick the name Reagan?"

"Because Reagan came after Carter."

Joss really laughed out loud this time. "You are just as cheesy as you are shameless."

John laughed too. Joss settled into a gap in the conversation and became silent. She traced the rim of her wine glass as she began to think about things. She liked seeing this relaxed side of John, but she needed to remember that this was something she shouldn't get used to. John would surely get bored with this life of "normalcy" and go back to the cloak and dagger life he led when he was saving the numbers. She would be setting herself up for heartbreak if she believed this surreal version of things. She simply needed to take each day as it came. She heard John calling her name.

"Did you say something?"

"You disappeared on me, Jocelyn. What are you thinking about?"

"You." She took a sip of wine.

"I'm flattered." John began to plate the food. "Care to share?"

"I was thinking that this house seemed very-"

"Permanent?" He cut her off.

"Yes…and expensive."

"Finch pays really well and he has an excellent severance plan." John smiled.

Joss had seen Finch's generosity first hand and she only helped him a fraction of the amount John had helped him. "Ok. But you know I'm only supposed to be in Chicago until they try Quinn. It may take a year or two but that's hardly a permanent situation."

"Jocelyn, have you ever considered that things won't magically go back to normal on the force once Quinn is convicted?" John walked the plates to the table and Joss followed. "Some of the dirty cops will still be gunning for you."

Joss felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. Finch must have told John about how some of her colleagues were treating her before she left. She wondered if that was why he followed her to Chicago. "Finch told you about the rat?"

"No, I had a surveillance camera at your desk. I saw it all when I was reviewing the tapes." He took a bite of steak.

"You what?" Joss stared at John angrily. "How could you?"

"Care about keeping you safe? It comes pretty easily. Would you rather I lie about it?"

Joss was furious. And she wasn't going to let John use the honesty card to charm her out of her anger. "Do you have devices planted at my current office? Did you put them in the flowers?"

"There's no need to now. Jocelyn, we're different people here. We can just be the professor and the lawyer that no one is trying to kill. And I suspect that we're both going to grow to love that."

"I'm not loving it right now." She mumbled.

John pretended he didn't hear her.

Joss knew John had a point, but she wasn't sure she liked him acting on _their _behalves without at least consulting her. He bought a house and planned to settle in Chicago. And she really hated how much she loved this house. It was weird this thing with John was like dating someone whom you had known for years but whom you had also only just met. As she thought about it, that's exactly what it was. And it made things weird.

There were so many things she didn't know about him. What middle name and birthdate had he chosen? Her mind wandered to the pink bedroom with the tree. They'd never talked about kids. Did John actually want kids? She was 43 years old. Getting pregnant again most certainly wouldn't be easy. And she wasn't sure if she even wanted to have another child at this age.

John had grown quiet after their exchange and Joss didn't know what else to say. So, she took a bite of her steak. It was heavenly. "John, this is fantastic."

"Thanks. It's not Ian Murphy's sea bass, but it'll do…" His voice trailed off at the end of the sentence.

"John Reagan, are you trying to pick a fight with me?"

"No."

"Then why would you bring Ian up right now?"

John moved his napkin from his lap to the table. "Well, despite my hope that this would be a romantic evening. It seems like tonight is our night to get things out on the table."

Joss sighed. "There's nothing to get on the table. You got to spy on the only date I've ever had with Ian. So what is there to get out?"

"Let's start with the reason your friends think you're stuck on him."

"You're jealous." Joss started laughing. "I can't believe you are actually jealous."

John felt himself growing angry. "Why are you laughing?"

"Because you were the idiot I was stuck on. When Lena and Nat asked me why I was so sad. Eventually, I told them it was because of a man, I couldn't give them your name. So, I had to give them a name I could remember. Ian's name was the first name that came to my head."

Joss felt herself becoming emotional as she thought of how much she missed John when he was gone. There were nights, after he had been gone for weeks without a call, that she was afraid that he was dead or just not coming back. She would cry her eyes out, get little sleep and then show up at work. And the worst thing was it just reminded her of when he checked out on her after Rikers.

She placed her napkin on the table and began to stand. "John, I'm really tired." She found her purse. "I think it's best if I go home. You don't need to drive me I can just call a cab." She stopped when she felt her hand on her arm near her wrist.

"Jocelyn, don't go."

She refused to turn around. She couldn't. The tears had already begun to fall.

"Please."

Joss wiped the tears from her eyes with her free hand as John turned her to face him. When he saw that there had been tears in her eyes, his heart broke. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be a jerk. Let me make it up to you." He kissed her forehead. "Just please don't go…not yet."

John cupped Joss's face with his hand and wiped her tears with his thumbs. When she nodded, "yes," John felt as though he could finally breathe again. He pulled her into a hug and held her close. When he looked down and saw her looking up at him with those big brown eyes, he said softly, "I can't lose you…I love you."


	6. Chapter 6

Hi all, I really didn't mean for this single date to turn into three chapters by itself, but John and Joss had some things they really needed to discuss. The tail end of the date will be mentioned at the beginning of the next chapter, we'll see a little more of John's life and then we'll jump a few months into the future. We also learn a little more about their previous trip to Texas back when Finch was kidnapped.

Hope this one isn't too sappy. Thanks as always for reading and for the wonderful reviews of the previous chapter.

**Chapter 6 –Revisiting the Past**

Joss remained without movement for what felt like minutes as she processed John's words. "Did you just say you loved me?"

John smiled. "Yes."

"You love me?" Joss laughed. Though she laughed, it was clear she was irritated. "How can you say you love me? You left me for two months."

John remained silent. He simply watched her

"You can stop trying to read me, John. I'm ticked off. Two months,. You left me for two months….with barely a word or a phone call. I was alone. In a strange city. And I didn't know if you were coming back." Joss fought back tears. She was so angry, her face felt like it was on fire.

"I'm here now, Joss." He took her hand and squeezed it. "And I'm not going anywhere."

Joss sighed, "You say that now, but how can you be sure? John, you haven't lived the every day 9 to 5 life since you were practically a kid. And even then, you walked away from it."

"I didn't have you, then."

Joss squirmed uncomfortably on the sofa. She didn't want to hurt John's feelings, but she had to be honest. Their relationship had always been built on as much honesty as the other was willing to share. "I hate to remind you, but your most recent two month absence wasn't the first time you checked out of my life. Remember what happened after Rikers? How am I supposed to trust that it won't happen again?"

John took a deep breath. This was a conversation they should have had a long time ago. He wasn't sure where he should start. "Joss, Rikers scared me."

As Joss remembered John trapped in a bomb vest, she could feel the trail of a tear as it slipped down her face. Her voice cracked as she spoke, "It scared me, too."

John kept his physical distance. He was lost in the memories of that night and just before he went to Rikers. "It scared me because for the first time in years, I knew I had something…someone to lose."

Joss's eyes widened at the beginning of the revelation. "John, I…" Joss was interrupted when John placed a single finger over her lips.

"When I knew I was about to be arrested, I told Harold not to worry about me because I was happy. And I knew it wasn't just because of the work I was doing. It was because of you, Joss. And then when Finch told me all that you had done to rescue me, I convinced myself that maybe you felt the same way, even though you were dating Cal. I thought of telling you that night on the bridge, but then Donnelly showed up and everything you'd ever worked for was suddenly in jeopardy. And still, all you did was try to convince Donnelly that I was a good man."

"You are." She touched his cheek.

"I'm still not so sure." He kissed her palm and held onto her hand. "But that was when I knew you felt the same way. Then Kara almost got us both killed when she hit our SUV and killed Donnelly. When Kara took me, I wasn't sure if you were ok. I vowed that if you were ok, I would never do anything to put you in danger again. And yet, when I thought I was at the end of my life in that stupid bomb vest, there you were willing to risk your life to save me. So, I decided that the only way to keep you safe was to stay as far away from you as possible."

"And I got no say in it?" Joss felt herself growing angry until John squeezed her hand.

"It was stupid of me to think I could stay away from you. I tried everything: avoiding you, becoming more involved with Zoe. Nothing worked. Eventually, I figured out that I needed you in my life…and maybe as more than whatever we were, but by that time you were preoccupied with HR…and Ian Murphy."

Joss couldn't help but smile as she saw the green-eyed monster flare up in John's baby blues. "It was one date with Ian."

"And a pretty passionate kiss."

"You sound jealous." Joss chuckled.

"You sound like Shaw."

"Really?" Joss raised an eyebrow. "I've never been accused of that before."

John smiled. "The night she and I staked out your date with Ian, Shaw implied that I had feelings for you, but I certainly couldn't tell her anything, especially when I hadn't broken things off with Zoe."

And suddenly, the green-eyed monster visited Joss. "And when did you break things off with Zoe?"

"The night after Blur, when I walked her home."

Joss couldn't help smiling broadly as she remembered Zoe making a point of bragging that John was going to walk her home. She knew she shouldn't have cared at the time since she and John were only friends. Still, that night, she was jealous whether she admitted it or not.

"Why are you smiling, Joss?" John teased. "Were you jealous?"

"Maybe." She smiled again. It was her turn to squeeze his hand. "But are you sure you're ready for a boring life as a professor and a boyfriend?"

"Well, I'm hoping that one day, I'll get promoted to husband and stepdad."

Joss felt her heart begin to race. "One step at a time, Speedy. You're talking about marriage and this is only our second date."

"Let's just say I've got a good feeling about this."

"Oh you do, do you?" She giggled. "Now what can we do to keep you feeling good?"

Joss climbed across John and straddled him until she was sitting on his lap. She kissed his cheek, which allowed her to take in the musky scent of his after shave and a trace of baby powder. Then she brushed her lips against his again and again until he deepened the kiss. As their tongues became tangled in a frenzied dance, John's hand moved across the plane of Joss's back. Her hands moved from John's neck to his hair. The more John touched her, the more Joss felt things she hadn't felt in a very long time. John's hands found their way beneath Joss's sweater as his lips found their way to her neck. Joss's body felt on fire. When she heard herself moan, it occurred that one of them should be levelheaded and John didn't seem to be volunteering for the role.

"John, " she called his name, which barely elicited a hum from him. She thought of the obvious baby's room on the second floor and the implications of what could happen if they didn't slow things down. "John, we need to stop."

He pulled back to look at her. "What's wrong?"

"I'm not sure we're ready for the next step."

John laughed, "I could take the next steps two at a time. "

Joss frowned. "That's what I'm worried about."

"Ok." He kissed each of her fingers. We can take things slowly."

"Thank you." She smiled. She looked at her watch. "Since we both have work in the morning, you should probably take me home."

"Or—" John said, pointedly.

"Or?"

"Or I can find you something more comfortable to sleep in and you can let me enjoy you waking up in my arms for the first time since Texas. I've got an eight o'clock class in the morning, so I can drop you off at your place in the morning with plenty of time for you to make it to work."

Texas. It was the trip neither of them ever talked about. Finch had been kidnapped and they had gone to look for him. Their fleabag motel had only had one room left when they checked in. John had offered to sleep in the bathtub but a mixture of guilt and compassion had prevented her from accepting his offer. So she told him he should share the bed. She'd even joked that if he didn't stay on his side of the bed, she'd shoot him.

It had been so long, at that time, since Joss had divorced Paul and shared her bed with anyone that she had forgotten how much of a snuggler she was. That is until she woke up with her arms and legs splayed across John Reese's torso while he drew lazy circles with his fingers near her shoulders.

As she awoke and realized what she had done, she sprang to her side of the bed. John laughed out loud and headed for the shower. It was the first time she'd heard him laugh in days. She waited for him to bring it up, but he never did.

This seemed to be the perfect time to remind them of how close they'd always been. "I'd love to stay…as long as you stay on your side of the bed."

Without missing a beat, John, replied, "I'm not the one who has trouble keeping my hands to myself, Jocelyn."

"Whatever. " She pulled herself up from the sofa. "I'm going to go get changed. Meet you in your room in 5?"

John nodded. As Joss began to climb the stairs, he called out to Joss. "Jocelyn, don't you want to know where I keep my pajamas?"

"I'll figure it out."

Joss used the opportunity alone in John's room to peruse his clothes. There were a few suits, some slacks, sweaters and shirts. After shuffling a few more hangers, Joss found what she was looking for.

John climbed the stairs and entered his bedroom. He almost tripped over his own feet when he saw Joss lying on his bed wearing only one of his "Man In The Suit" white shirts.

"How am I supposed to keep my hands to myself with you looking like that?" John eyed her hungrily.

"I thought keeping your hands to yourself wasn't a problem for you."

"Brat." He called out as he grabbed his pajamas bottoms and headed to his bathroom. As payback for her looking so ridiculously amazing, John decided to forgo his t-shirt.

When he entered the room, Joss swallowed hard. "Well-played, John. Well played."

John laughed and slid under the covers. He turned off the lights and immediately pulled Joss's body tightly against his, causing her to giggle. He took in the scent of her vanilla shampoo and began to stroke her hair.

"Good night Jocelyn."

"Good night, John." She kissed his arm that was wrapped around her shoulder. "I love you."

He kissed her forehead near her temple. "I love you, too."


	7. Chapter 7

Hi everyone, I'm still reeling from last night's POI. It was so great to see Det. Carter on my screen again with John Reese. I must admit that I felt so sad at the end of the episode. Anyhow, much like Hallucination Joss (because I refuse to believe she's actually not alive) I wanted to see John in love and happy for a minute (because we know that will never last in fiction).

So, this chapter focuses on John and his friendships. You met some of these characters on John and Joss's date at the gala. Once we get beyond this chapter, we'll move a little more quickly. I hope you all enjoy. Thanks for reading and for each and every review. I truly appreciate it.

And thanks to the lovely reader who caught the name switch and gave me a heads up. I appreciate it and I've edited.

**Chapter 7 - Happy**

It had been a very long time since John had awakened so happy. The woman he loved was in his arms and she was stunning. Her thick black hair was splayed across his pillowcase. He admired her flawless caramel brown skin, the shape of her catlike eyes and she smelled of vanilla and jasmine. Best yet, when the alarm clock sounded and she found him spooning her, she didn't move away. She simply smiled and said, "Good morning, John."

"Good morning, beautiful." He kissed the side of her forehead. "Can I get you some breakfast?"

She raised her eyebrows. "You cook?"

"A little." He smirked. He ran his hands over her stomach that was still covered by his shirt that she had worn to bed.

Joss shook her head with a chuckle. "That little smirk tells me you could probably work undercover as five-star chef and not be discovered."

"Oh, I can work undercover. " He nipped at her ear.

Joss released a string of giggles. "You are bad, John."

He kissed her neck. "You knew that before you said you loved me."

Joss flipped on her back and looked at John. She took in his steely blues eyes and his ridiculously high cheekbones. He was sporting a wide smile that made him look boyish even though she could see the salt and pepper at his temples. "I do love you, John." She kissed him. "But waiting seven hours since we said we'd take things slowly, isn't exactly taking thing slowly," she teased him.

"I can take things as slowly as you want." He captured her lips in a slow, seductive kiss that caused her body to feel like fire. And just as quickly as he had begun kissing her, John hopped out of bed. "French toast in ten minutes." Then he headed to the kitchen.

"I hate you." She called out behind him.

Later when John sat behind his desk at the University of Chicago, John was so lost in his morning memory that he didn't hear his colleague Armand walk into his office. Armand was older than John, somewhere in his 60s, yet he was exotically handsome, which was something that Joss had commented on a time or two during the gala. He had a thick accent that screamed that he was Spanish aristocracy.

"Someone looks like a love-sick puppy." Armand's smile was bright and teetered on the edge of being a laugh.

John straightened up and did his best to stop smiling. It worked for all of 20 seconds. Two dates with his beloved Jocelyn and he'd already lost his poker face.

"I'm guessing that the beautiful Jocelyn, from the gala, is the one who put that smile on your face?"

John simply nodded. He still wasn't completely comfortable trusting people, even those he considered to be friends with his emotions. But he surprised himself as he heard himself speak words that had only played his mind. "She's the one."

Armand broke into a full laugh. "I knew Mia was the one, five minutes after we met."

"I bet it took her significantly longer to figure out she wanted you." John teased.

Armand got very quiet. In an animated fashion he looked around the room. "Listen John. Do you hear that?"

John wrinkled his brows. He heard nothing and he was a trained as an operative for the CIA. "Hear what?"

"The sound of 1,000 coeds' hearts breaking as we speak." Armand began to laugh again.

"You're exaggerating again, Armand."

"Am I?" Armand made himself comfortable in a chair that sat opposite John's desk. "Enrollment in your classes doubled within the first week. I've even heard some of the other professors are taking your courses...and those are the professors that used to teach it."

"Armand." John eyed him with suspicion.

"It's true. My wife even asked if she could add you to her freebie list. I had to explain to her that only celebrities could be on the list."

"Sure she did." John threw a paper clip at Armand. Armand was a piece of work. He was one of the most published and cited authorities in the field. John had read some of Armand's work on the subject of linguistics years before John joined the faculty. Perfecting dialects and understanding language was very important to secret agents. And so, Armand had been well respected by many of his former CIA colleagues. And yet, what was most surprising about Armand, after filing meeting him in person, was that he had a real personality, something not possessed by all of the faculty. Armand was also one of the first to make him feel welcome.

"Does Jocelyn know your deep secret?" Armand eyed John curiously.

John raised an eyebrow at Armand. Jocelyn probably knew more about him than anyone who didn't have a high governmental security clearance or who wasn't named Finch. And he had done his best to fill her in on his new background over breakfast that morning. Specifically, she knew that John Reagan was born in Wyoming, was a military brat and moved around a lot as a kid. Reagan also had never been married and didn't have any children.

"What secret do you think I'm keeping, Armand?"

"Easy. You are trying to save the world." Armand chuckled. He then got even more comfortable and slid his feet onto John's desk.

"I don't know what you're talking about." John shoved Armand's feet off of his desk.

"Oh really?" Armand leaned forward with glee. "Wasn't that you who saved a nice lady from having her purse snatched last week?"

"Anyone would have done that."

Armand continued. "You teach English as a second language courses at Truman. You volunteer for Literacy Works and at the Boys and Girls Club. If I didn't know better I'd think you were Batman or at least Bruce Wayne." Armand stared at John for a minute.

Armand was coming a little too close to the life John used to lead and John didn't want to talk about it. In fact, he'd do anything to avoid it. He looked at his watch. "Speaking of the Boys and Girls Club, I should be going…" He stood up to leave.

Armand cut him off mid-sentence. "What are you trying to make up for?"

John raised an eyebrow, but remained silent.

"I mean, were you an axe murderer in a former life?"

Armand's question surprised John. He didn't want to lie to his friend and since Armand had been kind he didn't want to tell him to mind his own business. So, he decided to deflect with humor. "No, I've never killed anyone…with an axe."

Armand chuckled and John smirked. Armand was the first to break the silence. "I haven't known you long, but I can tell that you're one of the good guys. For some reason, you think you have to work overtime proving it. Don't work so hard that you miss having a real life, ok?"

"Thanks." John walked closer to the man's chair and patted him on the shoulder.

"John," Armand called as John turned to leave.

"Yeah?"

"You might want to tell Jocelyn that you are fluent in five languages. Women tend to find that kind of thing attractive." He then laughed. "But please don't ever tell my Mia."

An hour or so later, John walked into the Boys and Girls' Club and greeted a few familiar faces. His favorite was a 10-year old, little girl named Kennedy. Kennedy had deep brown skin and a round face to match her plump body. She had the most amazing dimpled smile and long dark braids. She also happened to be Anthony's little sister.

As soon as Kennedy saw John, she flew to his side and gave him a big hug. "Hey, Mr. Reagan!"

"Hi Kennedy!" He tugged one of her braids. "How are you?"

"I'm good. I've been practicing the self-defense moves you taught me."

"You have? Show me."

"OK. Try to grab my arm."

John reached for Kennedy's arm and then allowed her to very impressively twist his arm behind his back. While the little girl's skills might not be enough to stop someone with John's skills, they would be enough to stop the average guy on the street.

"Not bad" John followed his encouraging words with a bright smile. When Kennedy released his arm, John checked his watch. "Where's your brother? He's usually here by now."

"I don't know." Kennedy clammed up immediately, which was totally unlike the child. "I think he had a stop to make before he came here."

"What kind of stop?" John watched as Kennedy stonewalled him. He then bent closer to the girl's eye-level. "I can't help him if you don't tell me where he is."

"He went to get a gun."

He lifted her chin with his index finger to force her to look at him. "And why would he do that?"

Kennedy looked from side to side obviously not wanting to lie to John, but also not wanting to betray her brother.

"Are the gangs after him again?"

"No, you pretty much took care of that when you busted Russell in the nose the last time he stepped to Anthony."

"Then what is it?"

"Our stepdad."

"He's not our stepdad." Anthony appeared behind his sister. A vein began to show itself on his forehead. "He's our mom's boyfriend and you shouldn't be talking about our personal business. No disrespect, Mr. Reagan."

John set his piercing glaze on his young friend. The kid was obviously very upset.

"Anthony, if you tell me what's going on, I might be able to help you. "

Anthony looked at John with his own intense stare. The young man's skin was fairer than his sister's and he had grayish eyes that were even more striking than John's against his mocha skin. He was just as stubborn as John with the intensity of his stare. Finally, he broke first. "Just drop it ok?"

"Fine." John was willing to let it go for now. But he would not let the kid risk his future by getting arrested on a weapons charge. "But as soon as we're in the car, you're going to give me that weapon you just bought."

"But Mr. Reagan." Anthony whined a bit.

"There are other ways of protecting yourself and I'll start teaching them to you." John knew that Anthony had lost a lot in his young life, including his previous mentor, Mr. Booker. And while they were growing closer, John still needed to earn the kid's trust. Teaching him martial arts might just be the way.

"Whatever." Anthony rolled his eyes. After a moment curiosity got the best of him. "You said as soon as we got in the car. "Where are we going?"

"To dinner with me and my girlfriend."

"You have a girlfriend?" Kennedy threw her hands on her hips. "And you didn't tell me?"

John simply laughed.

That night John and Joss had the first of many dinners with Anthony and Kennedy. When Kennedy met Joss, she immediately looked at John and said, "Mr. Reagan, you swirl?"

Anthony immediately elbowed his sister., while Joss burst out laughing. John looked slightly confused until Joss said she would explain later.

At dinner, Joss learned that Kennedy was even a better interrogator than she was. After some gentle prodding by Kennedy, Joss learned that John Reagan's favorite color was burgundy, which he would later confess had everything to do with the color of the dress Joss wore to Blur. She also learned that his birthday was in November and that his ideal vacation was to go hiking in the Dominican Republic.

Anthony was as charming as his sister. He was Taylor's age and an old soul much like her son. He had a lot of questions about her job, specifically the prosecution of cases, until he learned that she handled federal cases involving drug lords, trafficking and corruption.

Joss couldn't quite read the expression on John's face when he dropped the kids off at their home. Sure, their neighborhood wasn't the nicest, but it seemed that something else was on his mind. When she asked if something was wrong, John assured her he was fine.

That night, long after John and Jocelyn had arrived at John's and turned in for the night, Joss went to the kitchen for a midnight glass of water. On her way back to John's bedroom, she stopped by the brown and pink room with the beautiful tree mural that would be perfect for a little girl. As she looked around the room, she thought maybe having children with John wasn't such a crazy thought after all.


	8. Chapter 8 - All In

Hi all. I know it's been a few weeks, but work has been crazy. This chapter we learn a little more about John and what he's been up to. I hope you enjoy. BTW, I really don't write smut so you'll have to read between the lies for parts of John and Joss's relationship. As always, I'm grateful for your feedback.

**Love Undercover Chapter 8 – All In**

Joss stood in John's kitchen making breakfast for her and John. It was a lazy Saturday and she decided to let him sleep in. She stirred the pecans into the pancake batter as she daydreamed about the current state of her life. She was in a loving, stable relationship with the love of her life. They had normal dates, spent Saturdays on the sofa and on occasion, Joss even managed to drag John to church on an occasional Sunday. Part of her hoped it would last forever; part of her knew it would not. And the part of her that knew why her current bliss-filled state would come to an end, knew it was because John Reagan had a secret.

Joss thought she knew what John's secret was; he was back working with Harold. That was the only explanation for the two phone calls he had disappeared to take over the last week. Harold must be trying to woo John back to Team Machine. She knew it had to happen sooner or later and sooner was probably better.

It had been four months since she and John had their first date at the Boys and Girls Club gala. Four heavenly months. And she was completely head over of heels in love with John…as she knew she would be. She just wished Harold had called him a week ago, before she and John made love for the first time. Now, it would be nearly impossible for her heart to recover from losing him now.

She felt John's chest against her back as he slipped his hands through her arms in order to wrap one arm around her waist while his free hand snatched a piece of bacon from a nearby plate. "Good morning, gorgeous."

John breathed in the familiar scent of her hair. If he hadn't smelled the jasmine and vanilla scent of Joss's shampoo, he would have sworn he was dreaming. Joss was in his kitchen wearing nothing but his shirt, making him breakfast and it was almost too good to be true. He pressed a soft kiss to her neck.

"John, you were supposed to be sleeping. I was going to surprise you with breakfast."

He nipped at her ear. "I just found you in my kitchen wearing my shirt and a smile PLUS you're cooking bacon! I can't think of a better surprise." He took a bite of bacon. It was perfectly crisp: not overcooked and not under cooked. And in three bites it was gone. "You're perfect." He began kissing her neck.

"You're horny." She giggled.

"Guilty as charged." He whispered in her ear. "Care to put me in handcuffs?"

Joss laughed at John's shamelessness. "Down, Tiger. I need to eat."

"Ok, for now." John smiled, widely.

John couldn't help laughing himself. He never dreamed he'd be this happy after he lost Jessica. And it was all because of the amazing woman standing before him.

Joss turned and faced him. Then she examined his face only to find a somewhat fresh, reddish cut above his left eye. Joss brought her hand to the cut. "Anthony?"

"Yeah," John smiled brightly. "He's getting really good."

Joss turned her attention back to pancakes on the griddle, but she continued to talk to John. "So you're still teaching him the CIA's version of self defense? Even though his stepfather is in jail?"

"He could get out. Not to mention Anthony still has to contend with the gangs. It doesn't hurt for him to know how to take care of himself."

Joss thought back to the call John received in the middle of the night about a month earlier. John's young mentee, Anthony and his sister were at the hospital with no one else to call. It seems their stepfather had put their mother in the hospital after a violent domestic attack. She remembered how Kennedy clung to John as they waited for news. Anthony simply paced.

Their mom was ok, but she was required to stay in the hospital for a couple of nights. Anthony's mom broke their hearts as she tried to prepare them to stay home alone after such a traumatic event. And then John and Joss broke every Boys and Girls Club rule and let Anthony and Kennedy stay with them for the duration of her hospital stay. It was then that John began teaching Anthony the art of Jiu-Jitsu as well as some hand-to-hand combat techniques. Joss watched them spar a couple of times, but she couldn't handle the intensity with which John trained him. When she suggested that John might want to take it easy on the kid, he reminded her that neither the gangs nor Anthony's stepfather would be easy on him. Ouch.

Joss missed Taylor desperately; so she loved the few days that she spent at John's house with the kids. Kennedy often asked if she could brush Joss's hair. She also gently coaxed Joss into buying her a similar shade of the tinted lip gloss she wore. And Joss was genuinely a little sad to see life go back to normal. That sadness disappeared some on the weekends when she and John got to have their Saturdays filled with quality time.

As Joss continued to cook, John pulled some strawberries out of the fridge and began to slice them with the skill of a sous chef.

Joss watched him for a moment in disbelief. "I don't even want to think about how you became so skilled with a knife."

John smiled, but chose not to comment and he continued to cut the berries. Instead, he grabbed two plates from the cabinets and watched as she slid pancakes and bacon on each.

Joss grabbed the strawberries and sprinkled them on top of the pancakes. "Strawberries are the perfect touch."

He smiled at her again. "We make a good team."

"You've always known that." She teased as they sat across from each other at one of the corners of John's table.

"I have." He leaned in and gave her a tender kiss. "We could always make our team a more permanent arrangement."

Joss looked up to find John's steely, blue-eyed gaze focused on her. "What are you suggesting?"

"You could always move in here. You're here most of the time, anyway." He smiled before he added. "That way your friends won't be surprised when I propose in a couple of months."

Joss was rendered speechless. She opened and closed her mouth twice without being able to speak. She took a sip of ice water to clear her suddenly dry throat.

John chuckled. He'd accomplished his mission of planting a very important seed in Joss's mind. And so, he thought, it was only polite of him to change the subject. "Jocelyn, don't you think we should eat? The food is going to get cold."

She took his hand and said a quick prayer of thanks over the food. And then she watched as John took a bite of pancake. "These are amazing. Why were you surprising me with breakfast?"

"It's the weekend. No rushing off to work, school or the Boys and Girls Club. I get to have you all to myself for the next two days."

"Why Jocelyn, do you plan to have your way with me?"

"Of course, I do, John. That's why you need to eat up so you can have plenty of energy."

The truth was it had been a particularly grueling week. Joss started the week with a visit to her Witsec liaison. He was a dry officer with absolutely no sense of humor. She found it ridiculous that she had to report to witness protection officer, since she wasn't exactly underground. What she was doing was closer to hiding in plain sight. If the remaining dirty cops in NY wanted to find her, they need only search her maiden name in a database of attorneys by state.

Later in the week, she and John had their first argument as a couple when he insisted on going with her to see the Witsec coordinator and she refused to allow him to do so. She was starting to wonder if John was being far too callous about being seen in public. They'd made up almost immediately, but still, she hated it.

As if that wasn't stressful enough, she was asked to sit second chair on the prosecution of a corrupt politician and she was assisting the lead prosecutor with the prosecution of the Columbian drug kingpin known as El Jefe…something she had not yet shared with John. She knew he would overreact about the potential danger involved in handling the case and probably ask her to give up the case.

Mostly, Joss was getting impatient for John to admit that he was once more working with Harold. She couldn't think of any other reason that he was unreachable during various times of the day when he didn't have classes or why he'd occasionally get a phone call that would cause him to leave the room. It was the times he'd leave the room on those calls that reminded her that she shouldn't get lulled into planning a life with John.

"Jocelyn." John called softly. "Are you here?"

She blinked at him in recognition. "I'm sorry."

"Where did you go?"

She looked up at him. "Are you working for Harold again?"

He dropped his fork as he stared at her in disbelief. "No. I told you. I want our…my life to be as normal as possible. I need us to have a chance like a normal couple."

Joss chuckled. "Normal couples don't move in together after four months, do they?"

"From what my students tell me, it's more common than you think." John took a gulp of orange juice. "What made you ask about Harold?"

Joss pushed a slice of pancake around on her plate. How could she tell John that she was just waiting for the bottom to fall out of this happy fantasy life he had created and that he wasn't helping matters by not telling her about every moment of his life? It even sounded crazy in her head. "I've noticed you disappear sometimes when you get a phone call…I guess I just assumed…"

"Jocelyn, I'm not going back. I promise. I couldn't if I wanted to." John stopped himself. He'd almost said too much.

Joss caught John's attempt to censor himself and decided to press on. "What do you mean you can't go back?"

John reached across the table and took Joss's hand. He noticed how his large hand engulfed her much smaller one. He did his best to speak as honestly as possible. "Jocelyn, when I told you I was a hundred percent committed to us, I meant it. I'm in too deep to walk away now." He squeezed her hand. So, what do you say? Do you want to make this your home?"

"I'll think about it….after you tell me who's on the phone when you feel like you have to leave the room."

John smiled. Joss was tenacious. It was one of the things he loved about her. He would give her the truth that hopefully did not lead to more questions. "It's usually one of m overseas colleagues. I'm never sure what their connection is going to be like, so I leave the room to go someplace quiet. Anything else?"

Joss looked at him. "No. I think that's everything. I also think I might like to be your roommate." Joss leaned over and gave him a sweet kiss. So sweet that she could taste the syrup from the pancakes on his lips.

John and Joss enjoyed the rest of their weekend together. As usual, Monday came too fast. John dropped Joss off at her office before heading to his usual Monday class. But John's Monday class was not at the University of Chicago as he assumed Jocelyn believed it was. It was at a nondescript building downtown that held the offices of the Centralized Intelligence Agency; John's other current employer.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hi all, I'm back. I've been working on this one for a long time. I really hope you enjoy this one. The tension between our couple is increasing here. And someone from their past makes an appearance. This one is a little longer than usual. **

Ian Murphy wasn't sure what had led him to bring his son, Alex to Chicago on his spring break, but they'd had an amazing time so far. They'd visited the Willis Tower, which the natives cautioned him to refer to only as the Sears Tower. Then they moved on to Millennium Park. Now, they'd found themselves at a local pizza joint called Exchequer Pub. It was at the Exchequer that he saw the most beautiful sight, a woman who looked exactly like the woman who captured his heart for a short time: Detective Jocelyn Carter.

Ian couldn't take his eyes off of the woman. She was with two friends and the three seemed to be having a great time. The resemblance was remarkable. He was about to tell Alex to wait for him at the table while he went to get a closer look when the woman approached him.

"Ian, I have to talk fast because in a minute the two women I am with are going to walk over here."

"Detective—" Alex began to say her name when she stopped him.

"Just Joss."

Ian's mouth fell open. "Joss?"

"Yes, can you both forget my last name…please?" Both Ian and Alex nodded slowly. She slyly slid one of her cards on the table.

Before she could continue, Ian asked, "Joss, are you in trouble?"

"No but, Ian, please just do what I say and follow my lead."

He smirked a familiar smile, which exposed his dimples. "You're sexy when you're bossy."

Joss laughed, which immediately caused Natalie and Lena to rise from their seats.

"One more thing," Joss added quickly. "These ladies are going to hate you."

Joss had barely gotten the words out of her mouth when Lena and Natalie approached the table.

"Hey Joss, are you going to introduce us to this Brad Pitt look-a-like? Is he a friend of yours or a friend of John's?" Lena asked.

Joss knew Lena meant to sound friendly, but in actually she was marking John's turf. She smiled at the amount of loyalty John could inspire in most women.

"John?" Ian raised an eyebrow and looked at Joss. Alex continued sip on his soda.

Joss ignored Ian and turned toward Lena and Natalie. "Ian is a friend of mine."

Natalie placed her hands on her hips. "Ian? As in Ian Murphy?"

Ian smiled broadly. His association with Joss had only been a matter of days. He'd felt they had a connection and Joss must have too if her knew friends knew his name. He extended his hand in Natalie's direction. "Yes, one in the same."

Natalie looked at him as if he was a piece of moldy bread. She remembered the pain he'd caused her friend. "I wish I could say it was nice to meet you." She looked at Lena who also eyed him with disgust.

"Joss needs to go. We're going to be late for work if we don't leave now." Lena gave Joss the stink eye. Both women were so busy looking between Ian's and Joss's faces that they didn't pay any attention to the piece of paper she let slip from her hand.

Ian began to object. "But wait, I have so many questions. Do you live here now? Can we have dinner or coffee or something?"

Joss gave Ian a sad smile. "That's really not a good idea. It was nice seeing you, Ian."

The three ladies headed toward the door while a shocked Ian watched. He was so engrossed in a multitude of thoughts that he almost missed Alex tugging on his sleeve.

"Dad, your detective friend dropped this piece of paper on the floor. It's got an address and a time on it."

Across town at the Central Intelligence Agency, Instructor Reagan taught his Combat techniques course to four new recruits. As he taught them, he was always sure to hold back a little. Part of him always knew that it would be possible for the Agency to turn any of these on him given the right circumstances. It would be to his benefit to hold a few moves back and to allow them to underestimate him.

This wise plan of his led to one of the recruits, a young guy named Sam, blindsiding him with a kick to the ribs. He was now sure one of them was broken. Apparently, it wasn't his day. He continued to teach, now strikes and hand movements. There was no point in showing pain. Instead, he planned to simply get the ribs taped up after class. And then, he would tell Joss that he was back working for the CIA. He hated keeping anything from her. Part of him knew the longer he kept it secret from her the more harm it would do to their relationship.

John continued to demonstrate hand strikes in pain. So, he was relieved when a field agent named Carl interrupted John's class. "Instructor Reagan, can I have a moment?"

"Sure." John knew Carl would only interrupt if it concerned Joss. As a favor to John, Carl was keeping an eye out for Joss off of the books. John knew he could trust Carl because when John was still working with Harold, he had once rescued Carl's daughter while she was on a trip to New York with her high school class. He suddenly grew concerned. John didn't trust that the NYPD would truly leave Joss alone. He suddenly grew concerned.

The two men stepped out of the training room and spoke in hushed tones. John rubbed his forehead. "Carl, what's going on? Is it, Joss?"

"Yeah, but I have a feeling that it's nothing to worry about, not really." The older man pulle surveillance photo from his pocket. It was a photo of Joss and Ian talking at lunchtime at the Exchequer Pub. He handed it to John. "I wouldn't have thought anything about it except it seemed that it was someone she knew from her past.

"It is." John deadpanned. He ran his hand over his face. "But you're right, I don't think it's anything to worry about."

"To make sure, I asked my partner to keep an eye on her and make sure the guy didn't try anything. He had a kid with him so it's not likely."

"Your partner is watching, Joss?" John really wanted to keep as few people involved as possible.

"Yeah. I told him she's an ex that I'm trying to dig up dirt on."

John eyed the picture of Joss and Ian again. Just holding it made him feel a bit stalkerish. "Call your partner off." He took a deep breath. "This guy was a friend of Joss's." He practically choked on the word friend.

"And what if someone followed him here to get to your lady?" Carl had seen the way Ian looked and Joss. He wasn't certain that he was just a friend. He really couldn't believe that John would be so calm about what could be a potential threat…at least to his relationship if not to Joss's safety.

"Then keep your eye on him, but give Joss her privacy." John reentered the classroom and finished teaching the session. "Unless she's in danger, of course."

About fifteen minutes after she got off work, Joss met Ian at La Colombe Torrefaction, a trendy coffee shop near her office. He hugged her tightly. "Joss, what are you doing here? Are you ok? You left New York with out a word."

"It's a long story." They proceeded to the counter for hot cups of imported coffee. Joss splurged on a brownie as well. When their orders arrived, Joss touched his arm and led him to a nearby table. "How long will you be in town?"

"For as long as you want me to be."

Joss shook her head. Ian was still shameless. She looked around and noticed that Ian's mini-me wasn't present. "Where's Alex?"

"He's with his nanny. " Ian leaned in close and whispered. "Tell me about this trouble of yours. Does this have to do with the dirty police you brought down?"

Joss raised an eyebrow as she looked into Ian's cool blue eyes. "You know about that?"

"Yes. It was in the papers. They said you were nearly shot." He took her hand. "I tried to call you but it was like you disappeared off the face of the earth. I'm guessing you moved here."

"I did." She nodded. "Ian, it's really important that you don't tell anyone I'm here. I'm technically in witness protection, even though it doesn't feel like it."

"Are you in danger?"

"Not really. There's a chance that there are some rogue cops still gunning for me, but I have no reason to believe they'd be looking for me here. "

"Your whereabouts will be our little secret." He nodded and then he smiled a thousand watt smile that he punctuated with a deep set of dimples.

"What?" Joss was surprised to find herself a little flustered. Ian tended to have that effect on her.

"I missed you."

"Ian," Joss sighed his name.

"I already know. You're with someone. Your friends made that clear." He then laughed out loud. "Apparently, they are big fans of his. I'd love to meet this guy."

It was Joss's turn to laugh. "You already have…at the safe house."

"Mr. Angry?" Ian leaned back in his chair and shook his head after Joss confirmed with a nod. He then leaned forward. "I knew that guy had a thing for you."

"I wish you had clued me in." She laughed.

"How did he win your friends over? He has the personality of toast."

Joss chuckled again. "You have to get to know him."

"I'm going to take a rain check on that offer."

They both laughed. A comfortable silence grew between them. Ian was the first to break it. "So, how are you holding up?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm guessing if you're here in secret, there are people at home you haven't been able to see: your family, your friends, your coworkers…me." He winked at her. "Seriously, I remember moving when I was younger, it wasn't easy."

She tried to smile, but Ian hit the nail on her head. She missed her mom and her son more than anything, even if she did get to talk to them frequently by phone, thanks to Finch. "You're forgetting that I'm not alone. I have John."

"And talking to him must keep you occupied for at least 6 minutes per day. "

"Ian…" Joss smiled, "I love him."

"The lovely lady wields a powerful dagger." Ian grabbed his heart. "And here I was hoping I still had a chance."

"Who said you ever had a chance." Joss teased. She looked at her watch. "I should be going or John will be wondering where I am." She and Ian both stood and she gave him a hug. "It was so good to see you."

"You too. Can I see you again?"

Joss looked at the ground for a second because she didn't want to hurt her friend. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Because it will put you in danger or because you're involved with John?"

"It's definitely the latter."

He sighed dramatically. After another moment of silence, he remembered something for earlier that day. "Why do your friends hate me?"

Joss smiled. "It's complicated. But the short story is that I needed a bad guy ex-boyfriend and your name was the first that came to mind."

"I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing."

Joss checked her watch once more. "I really have to get going. Good bye Ian." She kissed him on the cheek. "Take case of yourself."

Ian then watched as she walked away. When he was sure Joss was gone, he dialed his Assistant, Carmen. "Carmen, I need you to clear my calendar for the next few weeks. I'm going to be staying in Chicago longer than I anticipated."

Thirty minutes later, as Joss walked into John's home she wondered why she felt so guilty. She'd had a simple conversation with a friend. Nothing more. She found John sitting on a stool near the kitchen island.

"Hey baby." She kissed him. She immediately noticed that he winced as she touched his side. "Anthony really is getting good if he's leaving you in pain. Should I even ask if you've been to a doctor?"

John mentally yelled at himself. Joss had just given him the opening he needed to tell her the truth. He could simply mentioned that he hadn't been teaching his young mentee how to defend himself, but instead he was teaching people to be trained assassins. The thought itself made him sick. "Doctor said it's just a single fracture."

"Bravo John. I can't believe you went to the doctor." Joss moved closer to him and touched his chest above the tender spot. "I guess this means I'm going to have to be gentle for the next few months." She kissed him gently.

John moved to deepen the kiss, which Joss knew she needed to stop if she was going to discuss the day's events. As she pulled away, she held his hand. "There's something I need to tell you. I ran into someone today."

John's heart sank. Joss was ready to come clean immediately. She would never forgive him if he continued to mislead her.

Joss noticed the far off look in John's eyes. "John, did you hear what I said?"

"Yes, you were about to tell me that you ran into Ian Murphy today."

Joss's eyes widened. "How could you possibly know that?" She felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. John had returned to working with Finch and their lives were about to be turned upside down. And yet, she felt based on where they were in their relationship, they would be ok. "You told me you weren't back working with Finch."

"I'm not."

"Then how did you know about Ian? Were you following me?"

"No, I asked a coworker to keep an eye out for you to make sure there was no trouble with HR."

Joss stared at John. He wasn't making sense. "You asked a professor to keep an eye on me in case there was trouble from HR? That makes no sense."

"No, I asked a coworker from my other job." He took a deep breath. "The CIA."

**A/N: I initially planned to have John keep this from Joss longer, but he decided to tell. **** John and Joss are going to have a fight next chapter. Hopefully, they can come back from it. (I'm a Careeser at heart so they'll ultimately be fine. ) Look for more people from their pasts to arrive in the upcoming chapters. **


	10. Chapter 10

I'm so sorry it has taken me so long to update this story. I appreciate anyone who is still reading and I hope to be able to update at least a couple more times over the holiday season. I felt compelled to update near the two year anniversary of the worst travesty to happen on television. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

**Love Undercover-Chapter 10- Bumps in the Road**

Joss looked at the faces of her co-workers as they stared at her in disbelief. She knew she'd dropped a bombshell they weren't ready for, but she had to tell them before they heard it from John. Natalie opened her mouth and then closed it before being able to utter a word.

"What do you mean you and John are taking a break?" Lena was the first to speak. "He's the most perfect man in Chicago…maybe even in the U.S."

"Lena, please," Joss pleaded. "Taking some time away from John is hard enough."

"I'm sorry, Joss." Lena did her best to give Joss a sympathetic look, but it morphed into something of a much more confused nature. "I just don't understand what John could have done to cause you to break up with him."

"I didn't break up with him. I just need some space." _As for what he did, he __**rejoined **__the CIA, not that she could say so out loud. _

Joss sighed deeply. "I found out he wasn't being completely honest with me."

Natalie sat on the side of Joss's desk. "When you say he wasn't being honest with you, do you mean he was being dishonest, as in he told you he liked that grandma-ish grey skirt you wear from time to time or something bigger?"

"Something much bigger. And what's wrong with my grey skirt?" Joss frowned.

"The fact that you have all of those beautiful clothes in your closet and you don't know what's wrong with that skirt presents a bigger problem." Lena shook her head. "Did you find out he is secretly married?"

"No." Joss felt a little more bummed since that skirt was one of the few items she had purchased herself.

Neither woman paid her hurt feelings the least bit of attention, but instead continued to probe what happened with John. "Is he gay?"

"No."

"Did he cheat on you?" Lena sighed. "Because if he did I'm going to have to hurt him."

"No, John would never cheat. That's not who he is." No matter how furious she was with John, she knew he was a one-woman man. A part of Joss also knew that she had his heart the moment that they met, just as she was pretty sure he'd known the same about her.

Still, Joss knew she had to tell her friends the truth or as much of it as possible or her friends would never stop guessing what happened. And then dwelling in the sad state of her love life would ruin her day.

"Ok, Ok, I'll tell you if you promise to stop hounding me. And you have to keep it quiet." Joss took a deep breath.

"We will." Lena touched Joss's hand sympathetically.

Natalie rolled her eyes and mumbled, "Speak for yourself." Natalie soon felt the swift kick of Lena's foot.

Joss's mind flashed back to the morning of John's big announcement. He told her that he figured that going back to the CIA was his best option for them to stop hunting him, which would make it possible for them to be together like a real couple. So, he called Purcell, who had been his former handler, before Snow,. Purcell was a good man that he knew he could trust. Purcell had also been promoted to Deputy Director. After signing a few agreements about his willingness to testify against any of those who remained, should that become necessary and his agreement to complete one more mission on the Agency's behalf, he was a new man.

He was reborn in March as John Reagan, legally and completely, just days before he orchestrated it so that Joss could save him. And his new arrangement that allowed him to openly be Joss's boyfriend brought him more joy than he could imagine. In his heart, he knew his time with the Agency now would be different. In fact, the Agency even told him that he could _tell_ people that he worked for the CIA as training instructor, although it still wouldn't be a great idea to broadcast it.

There was only one drawback. The rebirth and the renewed ties to the CIA meant that some of his old ties had to be broken: specifically, those ties to his past life as a vigilante and to those friends who continued their work. It was the only way to keep them safe and keep the government from digging into their past. That wouldn't be too hard if they continued to live their lives there in Chicago, but a return to New York would most likely be out of the question.

Joss was overwhelmed by John's admission, his "new" job, and the fact that he'd made mountains of decisions without her input. She told him that she thought it was best that she not move in with him…at least for now. She also told him that she could use some space. Reluctantly, John agreed to give her space, which lasted all of one day before John started blowing up her phone.

After the memories passed, Joss looked at both her friends before she blurted, "John took a second job with the CIA as a combat training instructor."

"A combat training instructor?" Lena raised an eyebrow. "The college professor knows how to fight?"

"Yes, he's studied martial arts for years."

Natalie, "Oh no, sweetie, does this mean John is going to have to move to a different city?"

Joss frowned. "No, he can stay here."

Lena eyed her suspiciously. "Then what's the problem, Joss? What you just told me made John's sex appeal go from 10 to 15."

"He made this decision without talking to me…and I was about to move in with him." Joss turned her head and looked out the windows. She couldn't tell them that it also meant that John had to give up a significant portion of his past and part of the person that Joss had fallen in love with long before they got to Chicago. She wondered if he'd even be able to make it stick. "I'm not sure ready to move forward."

Joss tried to hide the tears that began streaming down her cheeks, but her friends saw them and quickly enveloped her in their arms. Lena spoke softly into Joss's hair. "Sweetie, couples have problems sometimes. You know that. But John is a good man and I'm confident you two can work things out. You haven't even been together six months, yet. You were bound to hit a speed bump. How long has it been since you talked to John?"

"Two days." Joss felt embarrassed that she was such a wreck after such a short period of time. "But it feels like a month."

Natalie smiled and then picked Joss's phone up from her desk. She pointed the phone at Joss. "Call him."

Joss hesitated and then took the phone from Natalie. She was about to start dialing when her office phone rang. When she answered the phone, the receptionist, Esmeralda, informed her that she had a visitor waiting for her at the front desk. Esmeralda said the visitor's name was Ian Murphy. Joss assumed it was John using Ian's name because she was refusing to talk to him, but when she arrived at the front desk, she was surprised to see that Ian…and Alex really had stopped by the office.

She stepped out into the waiting area and greeted Ian with a hug. "Ian, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to check on you and make sure you were ok." He looked at his son who was a four-foot version of Ian with the same blue eyes and blonde curly hair. "We thought maybe we could take you to lunch."

Joss was faced with the option of going to lunch with an old friend or talking to her new friends about her disastrous love life. She knew Ian would be the last person who would want to talk about John and that tipped the scales in his favor. So, she texted Lena and Natalie to tell them she decided to go to lunch with a friend and then she got Ian out of the office before Lena and Natalie got a chance to see him.

Ian, Joss and Alex walked to Hackney's, a quaint burger place in Joss's neighborhood. Alex was thrilled at their choice in restaurant and chattered to Joss about all the things he and his dad had done during the summer. At some point during lunch, Ian turned his attention to Joss.

Ian stared at Joss, giving her the once over. "Joss, you really look great. Chicago agrees with you, except…"

"Except?" Joss was curious as to what line Ian was going to give her.

"You look a little sad. Is everything ok?"

Joss could feel her body tense up. This is what she hoped to avoid at the office. She quickly responded, "I'm fine."

Her quick response did nothing to squash Ian's curiosity. "You're not fine. Is it Mr. Tall, Dark and Dangerous?"

"Ian, I really don't want to talk about it."

"Don't tell me you broke up?" Ian's eyes danced mischievously.

Joss wanted desperately to answer, "no," but instead she said, "It's complicated."

Ian could barely suppress the smile on his face. "I'm so sorry to hear that."

Joss shook her head and half chuckled. "That's definitely just a line."

"OK, maybe it is." Ian smiled before getting serious. "I hate to see you sad. And I won't get in the middle of your relationship with John, but if it's ever over, promise you'll call me."

"Ian," Joss sighed.

"Promise me."

"Fine. I promise."

Later that afternoon, John was surprised to find his field agent friend, Carl, waiting for him after his combat class. Carl had voluntarily kept an eye on Joss before to make sure shed was safe from HR. John knew Carl wouldn't have waited until after class to talk to him if Joss had been in danger. Still, Carl looked as if he had something to tell John that he didn't want to tell. "What is it, Carl?"

Carl fidgeted with his hands. "That Murphy guy is still in Chicago."

"And?"

"And he just had lunch with his kid and your girlfriend."

John ran his hands through his perfectly coiffed hair. "Carl, I told you to give Joss her privacy. Murphy's not a threat to her."

Carl smirked as he looked at the naïve man in his presence. "He may not be a threat to her, but he's a threat to you."

John felt the hair rise on the back of his neck. "A threat how?'

For dramatic purposes, Carl let his thick southern accent roll into a serious drawl, "He wants your lady. I can tell by the way he looks at her. Just thought you should know." Carl then walked slowly out of the fitness room.

John thought carefully about what steps he should take next. Joss was already angry with him. She was so angry she wasn't speaking to him. His next move could reunite them or tear them apart. John slowly dialed a number from his past and nervously waited.

"Hello," John heard the younger man's voice. Instead of calming him, the younger man's voice made him more nervous.

"Hey, it's me." John waited for a slight acknowledgement before continuing on. "I need your help with Joss."

"Is she in danger?" John could hear the worry that he hadn't meant to cause.

"No." John paused before he added, "but I might be in danger of losing her.

The voice replied, "Just let me know what you need me to do."


	11. Chapter 11

Happy New Year, everyone! What better way to start off the year than with Careese? Thanks to everyone who continues to read this story. This chapter is the build to the calm before the storm. Hope you enjoy.

I wish everyone God's blessings this year. Hope you are all healthy and prosperous.

Chapter 11

"You're taller." John eyed the younger man who held the key to his happiness just by virtue of his presence at John's home. John would play dirty to get Joss and if that meant bringing Taylor to him in order to bring Joss to him, he'd do it. Still, he was glad to see Taylor himself. He looked good; healthy, happy. The kid had grown a couple of inches since the last time he'd seen him.

"You're stalling. Spill. Why is my mom mad at you?" Taylor smiled. Before him stood John Warren or John Reagan as he now called himself, the original badass, who at a 6'2" tall was a towering pillar of muscle that was scared of a petite, black woman who stood all of 5'5." The truth was Taylor was too, so he got it.

John shook his head in amazement. Taylor Carter had inherited his mother's tactful bluntness. "She doesn't like that I took a job with out telling her." John continued to eye Taylor. "When did you cut your hair?"

"About a month ago." Taylor wondered how bad this job could be. Was whatever John was doing sketchier than what he had done in New York with Mr. Finch? Had John signed up to be a bank robber? "Mom's mad at you about a job?"

"A second job, actually."

"You doing something dangerous?"

"Nothing more dangerous than she's used to." John walked to the refrigerator, pulled out some lunchmeat, lettuce, tomato, etc. He began to make them sandwiches. Taylor remained silent the entire time. The silence was the same trick Joss used to make him talk. As he put the first sandwich on a plate and cut it, he said, "I'm working for the CIA… as an instructor."

"Which means you have to say goodbye to your old life and your friends in New York."

"How do you know that?"

"Mr. Finch is smart, but he definitely flies under the radar, which says he's doing something that could be illegal…nothing too bad because Mom still talks to him. But probably something you don't want the CIA to know about. Taylor frowned.

Gosh this kid was smart. John looked at him in amazement.

Taylor continued, "That also means mom has to give up her old life in New York, too. You did that without talking to her first?"

John set the newly completed sandwich in front of the kid and began working on another one. "I knew she would try to talk me out of it. I think she still has this dream of returning to New York when the trial is over. But it's never going to be safe for her there. There will always be some cop who thinks of her a snitch or a traitor. She needs to be away from there."

"Mom really doesn't like it when people make decisions for her."

John frowned. "I know. She hasn't spoken to me in nearly a week."

"Crap. She's really ticked."

"That's an understatement." John took a bite of his sandwich. "But," he paused as he eyed the teen, "I need to really explain why I've made the choices I've made. And I can't do that until you come clean with your mom."

Taylor shifted as John's eyes bored holes into him. John was using the Carter family trick on him. He could wait him out. He knew what John wanted him to do but he was going to do it. Yet, after a full minute of silence, Taylor finally spoke, "You want me to tell her about school?"

"Don't you think you should?"

Taylor pushed his plate of food away from him. He'd suddenly lost his appetite. "No, she's just going to tell me it's too dangerous."

John moved to the other side of the kitchen island and took a seat beside the kid. "Taylor, school starts in three weeks. When are you going to tell your mom that you are attending the University of Chicago?" John smirked. "I'd really hate to be you if she unexpectedly bumps into you while you're walking the streets of Chicago."

Taylor moved from the barstool. " I'll tell her when it's too late for her to make me drop out."

Joss looked at her burner phone. There were three missed messages from John and two text messages. She certainly had to give it to him: He was persistent. Still his persistence was about to drive her insane. She needed to process his return to the CIA, his decision to stop saving lives and his seeming decision that _their_ life would remain in Chicago. She dialed a familiar number.

"What can he possibly thinking, Harold? He knows what those people are capable of. We all do." Joss practically yelled into the phone. She paced her apartment while she talked on the small burner phone, not that Harold could see her. She'd surprised herself by phoning the recluse days after John dropped his bombshell about rejoining the CIA. Though she and Harold were friendly, she only called him rarely, like when she wanted to check on Taylor, by way of Harold's surveillance.

"I'm not certain which of John's decisions has currently raised your ire, but I am certain I can be of more assistance if you provide me with a little more information."

"John rejoined the CIA."

"Oh…"

"You knew about that?" Joss felt herself becoming even angrier. John said he hadn't talked to Harold and yet, somehow he'd gotten word to him about the CIA.

Harold cleared his throat. "Just because John is no longer in my employ doesn't mean I'm not concerned with his wellbeing. I keep track of his whereabouts much as he used to keep track of mine. When he kept arriving at the CIA building, I did a little research and learned that he'd decided to rejoin his former employer."

"And you didn't tell me? Harold, I've talked to you at least three times since he rejoined. "

"Joss, it wasn't my secret to tell."

She plopped down on her luxurious couch, which reminded her to be a little less angry with Harold. "Since you know John, maybe better than anyone, do you have any idea what he was thinking?"

Harold Finch knew exactly what John was thinking. He was choosing to have a life with the woman he loved. It was something Harold had been unable to permit himself to have with Grace. "Detective, I believe John was thinking that he wanted to have a life with you. That's something he couldn't do if he continued his association with me and my work with the numbers."

Joss shook her head "no," even though she knew Harold couldn't see her through the phone. "His work with you gave him purpose. What if he gives all of that up to be with me and wakes up one morning to find that it's not enough…that I'm not enough?"

"Joss, based on what he told you in the morgue, I think we both know that won't happen."

Joss felt herself blush. She'd suspected that Harold had been listening, but he'd never outright mentioned it before. She took a deep breath. "I think he'll do everything in his power to try not to have it happen. But people change."

Harold paused as he remembered how immediately taken John had been with the detective from the moment he'd seen her, the number of times he declared that he wouldn't or couldn't lose her and his willingness to forgive her anything. "You really don't understand how much you mean to him do you, Joss?"

Harold's question left Joss feeling slightly embarrassed. "I know John loves me," she stated quietly.

"Given the numbers he's saved and all that he's lost, don't you think he deserves some happiness?"

Finch had a point. "When you're right, you're right."

"And with Taylor accepting admission to the University of Chicago, you will have an opportunity to have your family again."

"Taylor did WHAT?"

"He hadn't told you?" Harold did his best to sound innocent. Typically, he believed that it was inappropriate to meddle but Joss was Taylor's mother. She had the right to be included in one of the biggest decisions of her son's life. So, Harold decided to help Taylor share the information his mom needed to know. "I assumed John took the job at the university when he learned of Taylor's interest in attending."

"So John has known for five months where my son actually wants to go to college? That's funny because no one, including Taylor thought to clue me in on the fact that he wanted to move here. It may not be safe." She worried her lip between her teeth.

"Joss, your enemies that remain are in New York, not Chicago. And Taylor wishes to attend the university where John teaches. Can you think of a better place for him to be?"

"Not really. But why hasn't he talked to me about it?" Joss couldn't believe her son would rather talk to her boyfriend instead of her.

"Have you let him?"

Joss's mind flashed to the conversations she'd had with Taylor over the burner phone. He'd asked about coming for a visit. And he'd talked about how much he missed her, but she'd quickly changed the subject. It was too painful to talk about the things their hearts wanted but couldn't have. She leaned her head back and closed her eyes.

"Harold, I guess I haven't." She released a deep breath she hadn't realized she was holding. "So, John was willing to change his whole life in order to give me mine back."

Harold smiled. "Actually, I think John changed his life so he could share a life with you."

Joss closed her eyes as she processed Harold's words. She soon found herself overwhelmed by what John was willing to give and feeling bad about how she'd reacted to it. And then there was Taylor. Was it really that bad that he just wanted to be close to his mother? "Harold, I've got to go. Thanks for listening."

"Anytime Joss." He paused momentarily as he considered where the former Detective might be running off to. With a smile in his voice, he added, "Please, give John my regards."

Taylor followed John as he gave him the tour of the house. He was impressed by the spaciousness of the place. And Taylor was touched when John showed him the room that he had designated as Taylor's to use whenever he chose to be there. He paid special attention to the room with the tree mural. When he and John arrived back at the kitchen, Taylor eyed John suspiciously.

After a minute or so, John picked up on the way Taylor was looking at him. "Something on your mind, Taylor?"

"You don't need me to tell mom about school. She's not really mad about you changing jobs. I get it now."

"Get what?" John grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and handed it to Taylor.

"Why mom's not talking to you. My dad said she was like that all the time when she had me."

"Had you do what?" The kid was practically talking in code.

"Mom's pregnant!" Taylor said like he knew what he was talking about.

"What?" John's eyes grew bigger as they focused in on Taylor.

"Unless I was imagining things, one of those rooms looks like a baby's room." He took a deep breath. "You put a baby in a baby's room. I get that you guys aren't telling people, but I'm her son."

Before John could respond, his doorbell rang. He looked at Taylor. "Hold that thought."

John moved swiftly to the door. He thought it might be Kennedy and Anthony who were supposed be stopping by after school. When he opened the door, he could barely believe his eyes. "Joss?"


	12. Chapter 12, part 1

Hi all,

Chapter 12 was getting a bit long. So, I've decided to post it in 2 parts. I'll post part 2 as soon as possible. Thanks for all of the reviews you've given and for continuing to keep up with this story. Part 1 is establishing fluff, while things get a little more interesting in part 2. Hope you enjoy.

LOVE UNDERCOVER – 12 – Part 1.

Joss swallowed hard as she saw John for the first time in almost week. They'd spoken, briefly, during the course of the week when he'd called so often she couldn't ignore him. She'd softened when she heard his voice, but his voice was nothing compared to seeing him. He wore a blue short-sleeve polo shirt that accentuated his sky-blue eyes and a pair of khaki walking shorts. And although he'd just gotten his hair cut, she still noticed the grey that peeked out at his temples. He looked totally suburban and yet, he was completely sexy. She remained silent as she just took in the sight of him.

John was no better.

"Joss?" he practically whispered in disbelief. In his excitement that she was finally there and had finally come around, he slipped into the familiar nickname that he called her in another lifetime. She was beautiful. Her flawless skin glistened from the August heat. Her hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail that he craved to loosen. She wore shorts and a fitted t-shirt that showed off her curves. Curves he couldn't stop looking at.

"Hi." She glanced at his eyes before shyly looking down at her feet. A moment passed, and she looked up again to see John's penetrating stare fixed completely on her. She smiled at his intensity. She loved his intensity. "John, are you going to keep staring at me or are you going to let me in?"

He chuckled. "I'm sorry. Come in. It's just, I wasn't expecting you."

John stepped aside so Joss could walk through the door. He shoved his hands in his pocket to keep from touching her. He looked around, running his eyes over the living room and quickly scanning the kitchen and noticing that Taylor disappeared.

Ever the detective, even though she hadn't been a member of a police force in nearly nine months, Joss noticed John's movements. "Am I interrupting something?" When John hesitated, Joss felt the heat rush to her cheeks. "Or someone?" She fought against her anger. She didn't want to assume the worst. "I guess I should have called first, although I wouldn't have guessed you 'd have found _company_ within a week…I should go." She stood to leave when she felt the heat of John's large hand wrap around her much smaller wrist.

"Joss, wait. It's not what you think." He continued to gently hold her wrist. "It's ok." He yelled in the direction of the kitchen. "You can come out."

Taylor stepped out from around a corner that led to the back door. "Hi Mom."

Joss's eyes grew to the size of saucers. "Taylor?" John released her arm completely freeing her to go to her son, but she just froze. The tears began to flow down her cheeks. After a nine-month absence from her presence, he was only a few feet away. She'd missed her baby so much. He was taller and his hair was shorter and the combination of those things made him look less like her baby and more like a grown man. How could she have allowed herself to miss so much? The tears began to flow more heavily.

"Mom? Are you ok?" Taylor's voice was soft.

John looked at Joss and fell more in love with her by the second. She was an incredible woman with such a full heart. He smiled at Taylor. "I think your mom just needs a hug. "

Taylor smiled as he fought back tears. He then walked to his mom, his pace quickening with each step. Soon, Taylor was encircled in his mother's loving arms.

"I missed you so much, baby," Joss squeaked out between sobs.

"I missed you, too, Mom." Taylor kissed her on the cheek before pulling from her embrace to discretely wipe his own tears. "So, when were you going to tell me?"

"Tell you what?" Joss looked confused. She looked at John who was wearing a strangely hopeful look on his face.

"That you and John are going to have a baby."

Joss processed Taylor's words in slow motion. When she understood what he was saying she shook her head no. "You think I'm pregnant? Why in the world would you think that?"

Taylor wrinkled his brow as he looked between his mom and John. "It's obvious."

Joss looked down at her perfectly flat stomach and then looked back at Taylor. "Am I missing something?"

Taylor shrugged. He then walked to John's sofa and plopped down. "I mean, you don't _look_ pregnant, but John said you've been really mad at him."

"He screwed up!" Joss raised her voice more than she intended. John felt the blush rise to his cheeks and he quickly looked away. "He kept things from me and I had every right to be mad."

"I've tried to apologize." John interjected only to be met with Joss's irritated gaze.

"We can talk about this later." Joss turned her attention back to Taylor. "Why does me being angry mean I must be pregnant? John has made me mad before."

"Yeah, but back then, you to weren't…" His voice trailed off before looking between John and his mom and then back to John. "Are we really going to pretend there's no baby's room upstairs?"

John mumbled, "It came with the house."

Taylor thought about the other things he had seen. "There are stuffed animals and toys and stuff, too."

John spoke up, "Those belong to Kennedy." John noticed the confusion in Taylor's face and answered before Taylor could ask, "I mentor Kennedy and her older brother, Anthony at Big Brothers. Some bad stuff happened and they had to move in here with your mom and me for a while."

Taylor smirked, "So, you were playing house with my mom. You and I are going to have to talk about your intentions, Mr. Badass."

Joss curled her lip as she gave Taylor the once over. "Are you sure this whole pregnancy thing isn't just your way of trying to distract me out of asking why you are here or the even bigger question of why you are planning to attend the University of Chicago when I specifically asked you not to come to Chicago?"

Both John and Taylor's eyes widened to the size of saucers. It took everything in Joss to keep from laughing at the busted men in front of her. She looked from Taylor to John and then back to Taylor. "Anyone want to explain?"

"How did you know?" Taylor gasped.

"Mama always knows. Now, one of you talk."

"I was going to tell you." Taylor was the first to break under both John and Joss's stares. "But I knew you would say it's too dangerous for me to be here. It isn't, Ma. All of your enemies are in New York. If it's safer for you and John to be here, it's safer for me and grandma to be here, too."

Joss raised her left eyebrow, silently asking a question before the words could exit her mouth. "Grandma's here?"

"No, I was making a point. We miss you, Ma. We're a family and we should be together. Dad's fine but it was you that I spent everyday with for 12 years of my life, not dad. I'm 18 now, which makes me an adult. So, I'm staying." He looked down at his feet before he mumbled, "And that's all I have to say."

Joss erased the angry face she had been trying so hard to hold on too. "Ok."

"OK?" Taylor wasn't sure he'd heard his mother right. "I can stay here…in Chicago? With you and John?"

Joss now smiled brightly. "Yes, you can stay here if it's ok with John…on campus IF you promise to be careful and promise that you'll let John know the minute you see something suspicious."

"I promise!" Taylor jumped off of the sofa and ran to give his mom a bear hug, causing her to laugh out loud. "I missed you so much, Ma."

"I missed you, too, baby." She stood back and cupped her boy's cheeks in her hands. Knowing that he would be there to see whenever she wanted brought an unspeakable joy to her heart. Then she decided she better clear something up before he got a little taste of freedom if he chose to live in the dorm. "But, speaking of babies, no one is bringing any babies in this house without being married. Got it?"

Taylor looked at his mom and then at John. "Well…"

Joss's neck snapped to attention. "What do you mean well?"

"Someone already broke that rule." Taylor made his way to the kitchen. "Promise you won't get mad." He called out behind him.

"If I'm a grandmother, I'm going to be more than mad." Joss called behind Taylor. She then turned her best interrogator's stare on John. "What do you know about this?"

"Nothing." John threw his hands up in the air. He silently prayed there was a reasonable explanation for whatever Taylor had up his sleeve. "For the record, I only knew about him coming here to school."

She raised an eyebrow. "Only?"

Before the suspense could build too much and before Joss could fuss at John for keeping her son's secret about school, John and Joss heard the scrambling of paws across John's wood floors. A second or so later, the Belgian Malinois made eye contact with his former owner.

"Bear?" John gasped.

The 65-pound dog almost knocked him over as he stood on his hind legs and attempted to slather him with kisses. He stopped when he noticed Joss. He then ran to her and gave her the same treatment. He then ran back toward the door where Taylor had let him in.

Taylor called out loudly enough for John and Joss to hear him before they could see him. "Yeah boy, I tried to give them a heads up. But mom may not let her stay…seeing as you didn't marry her mother."

Soon Bear entered the living room again, all the while looking back at Taylor, who was behind him carrying the most adorable puppy either of them had ever seen.

"Mom, John, I want you to meet, Ursa. She's the product of Bear developing a bit of a thing for a cute little German Shepherd that he and Mr. Finch used to encounter when they went for their walks in the park." Bear proudly looked to and from each of his loved ones as Ursa whined in Taylor's arms. "There were four pups. Lionel and Lee took one, Shaw took one and the third one went to a lady named Zoe."

Joss rolled her eyes at Zoe's name, which didn't go unnoticed by John...

Taylor continued, "Ursa was the last of Bear's pups. Given his work, Bear can't exactly be a full-time dad. Ursa was Mr. Finch's favorite of the pups, so he didn't want her to go to just anyone. I thought now that you and John were domesticated, you might be able to give Bear's little girl a home."

Taylor put Ursa on the floor and she immediately ran behind Bear and then under the sofa.

"So what do you say?"

Joss curled her lip at her son and shook her head. She sat on the sofa and was soon joined by Bear who placed his head in her lap. "T, you're good. You pulled out all of the stops. Right down to our old friend, Bear and his adorable little puppy."

"She needs a home, Ma." He smiled as Bear rested his head on Joss's knee right on cue.

"John's house, John's call." Joss rubbed the top of Bear's head. "By the way, where were you hiding these two for the last 20 minutes?"

"Mr. Finch's driver had them in the car." Taylor walked closer to John.

"Finch has a driver here?" Joss asked.

"Yes, he wanted to make sure I was perfectly safe on my visit. Taylor looked at Ursa, who had now crawled from under the sofa and back near Taylor's feet. "Well John, are you going to give a home to a deserving little girl?" On perfect cue, Bear heeled and whined a little bit.

John was about to say yes and quite enthusiastically so. He had missed Bear something awful and he thought the puppy was adorable. But before he could, the doorbell rang. "Hold that thought."

John opened his door to find Kennedy and Anthony. Both greeted him with a hug. Kennedy's eyes zoomed in on Bear and daughter immediately. "We got dogs?"

John raised an eyebrow at the girl. "No, we didn't get dogs. And this is very important when dealing with dogs that are not your own. You have to be careful when you approach a strange dog…" his voice trailed off as he watched the girl pay him no mind and walk directly to Bear and Ursa. Within minutes, she'd made two new friends. And within the hour, Ursa was sleeping in her lap as Bear looked on proudly.

Taylor and Anthony hit it off like old friends. After introductions, they headed outside to play cards.

The hour had also brought about a thaw in the recently icy relationship between John and Joss. It happened as Joss was watching John sitting on the floor next to Kennedy teaching her how to train Ursa to sit. Her hear warmed as she thought about what a great dad John would be. She began to seriously consider whether she could really start all over again with a brand new baby. The longer she watched John with Kennedy, the more she believed she could. On her way to the kitchen, she ran her hands across John's shoulders. John felt like he could breathe for the first time in a week.

As soon as Joss was out of earshot, Kennedy whispered to John, "Mr. R., are you and Miss Taylor swirling again?"

John fought back a laugh and nodded. "I think we are, Kennedy."

"Good." Kennedy became suddenly pensive. "I like it when she's around."

"Yeah, kiddo. I do, too."


	13. Chapter 13

_Hi all,_

_I'm back. Thanks so much for the reviews and encouragement. Part 2 took a little longer than I expected. John and Joss are working things out…and bonding with Taylor. Things will start to pick up for the Carter/Reagan family unit after this chapter. Please forgive any typos (I tried to catch them.) Hope you enjoy._

Love Undercover - Chapter 12 part 2

Joss learned some things about the men in her life. Not only would John make a great dad, but she also learned Taylor would make an excellent big brother. Taylor and Anthony not only played cards together for an hour before dinner, but both boys took the time to show Kennedy how to play while Bear and Ursa took much needed naps. This gave John and Joss some alone time while they prepared dinner in the kitchen.

As John was seasoning the steak he was going to grill, Joss walked up behind him, slipped her arms around his waist and rested her chin at the center of his back. She inhaled the familiar scent of his cologne that was masculine, musky and so him. She sighed before saying breathily, "I missed you."

"Does this mean I'm out of the doghouse?"

"Not if your living room is any indication." She chuckled and then placed a kiss on his back before moving to his side where he could see her.

John washed his hands and dried them on a towel before bringing his hands to touch her face. "I hate it when you won't talk to me."

"Really? I couldn't tell." Joss smiled at him. "You know if you would just give me a day to think and calm down, I could get over things faster."

He stared at her intently. "I would if it didn't feel like I couldn't breathe without you." He swallowed hard, which caused his Adam's apple to bob. "I guess I'm just afraid that maybe you'll decide that we're a mistake. Maybe you'll figure out that you can do better than a guy like me with a checkered past."

Joss's eyes grew large. "Are you kidding me? John, I couldn't do better if I tried. You're a good man with a good heart. "

"But you know some of the things I've done in the past. Can you really tell me that you don't ever wonder if life would be easier with someone like Ian?"

Joss smiled and John's jealousy. "I don't have to. You're the only man I want. Yes, you drive me crazy at times but you have such a good heart. And seeing you with Anthony, Kennedy and Taylor lets me know that you are going to be such a great dad to our children someday. I just try to take a break so I don't say something that we can't come back from."

John smiled. "Jocelyn, there's nothing you can say that I wouldn't forgive. I'd rather you just yell at me."

"I'm sorry. I just never want to be responsible for the sadness I used to see in your eyes."

John looked at her. There was a fire in his eyes. He raised his voice, though not enough for the kids to hear and be alarmed. "Have you ever seen the pain in John Reagan's eyes that you used to see in Reese's?" He searched her eyes. When she didn't answer, he repeated himself. "Have you?"

"No," she said quietly.

"You know why? Because I have a life AND a purpose. That purpose may not be as noble as it once was but it means something to me. Kennedy and Anthony depend on me to be a stable force in their lives. They feel safe when I'm around. I get to teach them things and make sure they succeed in life. And it has a lasting impact on them. I have two jobs that allow me to mold young minds. I can keep young operatives from falling into the same traps I fell into and I can give students a love of language. Most importantly, I am in love with an amazing woman. She has the biggest heart and she gives more love than I even knew was possible to give. "

Joss swooned a little inwardly. She knew how much John loved her, but she didn't know how much he loved the new life he'd built.

John continued on. "This amazing woman and her incredible son are also much safer in Chicago than they are in New York."

"And she doesn't like anyone making decisions for her." Joss folded her arms in front of her. "John, we could have talked about you going back to the CIA before you made a decision that was this huge. We should have talked about it. We're in this together now."

"I get that. But if we had talked about this before, you would have assumed that I was giving up the numbers for you. You would've felt guilty. But that was only part of it. Yes, I wanted to be able to give you the life you deserved. But, I also wanted to be able to have a life…with you." He looked down at his hands, which now held hers. "Can you forgive me?"

Joss nodded slowly as she stared in John's eyes. She was moved by the thought John had given to building a life with her and for himself. He closed the space between them and he leaned down ready to kiss her. He was surprised when she moved her fingers to his lips to stop him.

"Promise me. No more lone-wolfing."

He smiled. "I promise…as long as you promise the same."

"I don't…"

"HR, Chicago, Witness protection meetings…"

She pretended to pout. "Fine. I'll do better." And then, she suddenly broke into a smile. "I love you so much." She stood on her toes and kissed him.

"I love you Jocelyn Taylor." John leaned in to kiss Jocelyn once more when he was interrupted by a familiar, high-pitched voice.

"Get it, Mr. R." Kennedy smiled before adding a wink and ducking out of the kitchen.

Joss laughed. "What are we going to do with that girl?"

"Lock her up and refuse to let her date until she's 30."

"Spoken like the father of a little girl."

"Surrogate father." John corrected. "But earlier, you mentioned you could see me being a great father to our children. You only have Taylor…is their something you want to tell me?" John raised his eyebrow.

"No, I'm not pregnant…if that's what you're thinking." Joss watched John's face deflate before she added, "but I'm not opposed to changing that, if you're up to being a dad..."

John simply pulled Joss into his arms and smothered her with kisses. When he finally composed himself, he stared at her. "How would you like to have a party next Saturday? Just a few people, Armand, Natalie, Lena, the kids… Taylor leaves on Sunday and he won't have time to hang out with us when he comes back to school."

"I think it's a great idea." Joss cooed.

After dinner, Joss and Taylor walked Bear and Ursa while John took Kennedy and Anthony home. They walked in silence for a few blocks as Taylor took in the Chicago sites that were new to him. When they came to Wrigley Field, the ballpark was fully illuminated because the Cubs were playing a night game.

"Ma, this is so cool. There is a baseball stadium in the middle of a neighborhood. I love Chicago!"

Joss laughed loudly. "I'm glad, T because I really missed you. And I'm glad that you didn't listen to me about staying away because I love you more than words can say." Joss grew quiet. "You know every neighborhood in Chicago isn't as safe as this one seems to be, right?"

"Yeah, I've seen stuff on the news."

"When you move here, you have to be careful. You have to watch where you go. And something is going on with the policing situation here. So, when you move here, if you get stopped, the first thing you tell them is that your Uncle Lionel is a police officer."

"And hope they don't ask for his picture." Taylor couldn't stop the giggling that came from his mouth.

"T, I'm serious. I just want you to be safe."

"I know." Taylor's demeanor changed. "Anthony told me about some of the stuff he's seen. I felt bad for him and his little sister, although it seems like she doesn't let stuff get to her."

"Yeah, John really took to them."

Taylor smirked. "Of course he did. Anthony is practically John's clone. He's super quiet but every now and then he surprises you by saying something funny."

Joss had noticed the similarities between the two as well. "John also says that Anthony is the best sparring partner he's ever had."

Joss and Taylor were only in the house a few minutes when Joss's cell phone rang. She looked at the caller id and saw that it was Ian. When she answered he was talking a mile a minute. It was Alex. He'd been hospitalized with appendicitis. They were preparing him for surgery.

"Ian, calm down. I'll be there in a few. He's going to be ok."

Joss dialed an Uber and grabbed her purse and keys.. "Tay, I have to go to the Northwestern to see my friend, Ian. His son, Alex is having an emergency appendectomy. Ian is scared to death. Tell John I'll be home as soon as I can." She kissed Taylor on the cheek and headed out of the door.

John came home about 15 minutes later. He was still smiling from the events of earlier that evening. The day had been almost too perfect. Bear rushing to his feet as he entered his home punctuated that fact.

"Hey Taylor, " John greeted before taking a look around. "Where's your mom?"

"Went to help a friend." Taylor said, not lifting his head from a text he was composing.

John shook his head. Teenagers were teenagers. Taylor's response wasn't much different from Anthony's. John knew the best way to get their attention was by being blunt. "Let me know when you have a second."

"Uh huh."

"I want to talk to you about me proposing to your mom."

Taylor slapped his phone on the sofa. "What?" Then, seeing John's smile, he began to smile broadly himself. "That's awesome!" He high-fived John and pulled him into a hug. "When?"

"I'm thinking on Saturday at the party. Because of the work I used to do with Finch, I could have never done something publicly like this for your mom before. But I want the whole world to know how special she is to me. I love her, Taylor."

Taylor laughed. "Man, you are so whipped! But it's ok because it's my mom."

"Are you sure you're ok with it?"

"Yeah, I'm better than ok with it." He hugged John again.

John sighed deeply. The life he'd always wanted, the one he never thought he'd deserve, was coming together. He was going to be a stepdad and who knew maybe a new dad at some point.

"So, did you get a ring, yet?" Taylor interrupted John's thoughts.

"No, but I'm guessing she's going to want to stay home from work tomorrow to be with you and so I'm going to grab her friends Lena and Natalie and have them look at the finalists."

Taylor smiled. "So, you've been thinking about this for a while, huh?"

John simply smiled. He looked at his watch. "Where did you say your mom is again?"

Taylor shrugged and moved to the kitchen and began to raid the fridge. "At Northwestern…hospital, I think."

"The hospital?" John felt the vein in his head begin to pulse. "Taylor, can you tell me specifically what she said?"

Taylor took a bite of sandwich, chewed, swallowed and then said. "Yeah, Mom said her friend Ian's kid was having an appendectomy at Northwestern and she'd be home as soon as possible."

John softened. "She said she'd be, 'home?'"

"Yeah." Taylor kept eating, but noticed a peculiar expression cross John's face from the time he'd said, "Ian's kid," until it did a 180 when he said home. Taylor might be young but he'd had girlfriends and seen guys who'd wanted those girlfriends. From John's expression at the name Ian, Taylor thought he could assume that he'd been trying to give John some competition for his mom's heart.

John shifted on his heels and then looked at his watch again. "Tay, do you mind if I-"

"No John, go get your woman." Taylor laughed before picking up his phone and beginning to text again.


	14. Chapter 14

Hi all, this is a shorter chapter featuring a green-eyed monster known as John Reagan. A little background: Bruce Wellington is Ian's son Alex's grandfather who kept Alex from Ian for years. Next chapter is ring shopping. I hope you enjoy.

LOVE UNDERCOVER – 13

Joss watched as Ian paced the floor of the hospital waiting room. It didn't take her detective training to figure out he was worried sick. "Ian," she called gently, "why don't you sit down for a minute? Driving yourself crazy isn't going to help Alex. "

He nodded and took a seat beside her. "I should have brought him to the hospital the second he said he had a stomachache. If Wellington finds out about this he's going to try to take him away from me."

"You couldn't have known. Kids get stomachaches all of the time." She patted his shoulder. "You're doing a good job with him. I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it."

Ian looked at Joss and smiled. She was a good friend. He was glad she was there. "Thank you so much for dropping everything to be here with Alex and me. It means a lot." He patted her hand and after a second allowed his hand to rest on hers.

Joss pulled her hand from beneath Ian's, gave his a quick squeeze and then returned her hand to her lap. "Ian, it's hard for all new parents. There are so many things that can happen, but the good news is that kids are pretty resilient."

"Something tells me I'm going to need you to remind me of that when we have our baby." John's voice seemed to come from nowhere. Joss jumped at the sound of it.

"Joss, are you pregnant?" Ian looked like a deer in headlights.

"No." She gave John THE eye. This was not the time for a pissing contest. Leave it to John to decide to mark his turf when poor Ian was worried about his son.

"She's not pregnant yet." John corrected. "I hope to change that fact very soon." When Joss's eyes remained fixed on him in an unyielding fashion, he decided he should play nice. "Ian, I was very sorry to hear about Alex. Is there any word on his prognosis?"

Ian simply shook his head, no. He looked again at Joss. He didn't know that she and John had gotten back together. And now, they were planning a family? It was a lot to wrap his mind around.

John took a seat on one of the nearby chairs and crossed his leg over his knee. He then focused his laser-like focus on Ian. This caused Ian to squirm a bit.

Joss decided to make small talk with Ian while she continued to give John the eye. "Ian, Alex will be ok. Taylor had an appendectomy when he was a little older than Alex and he's now a healthy, happy 17 year old boy."

"Thanks," he looked at her and then noticed John's stare. "Hey Joss, you…and John don't have to stay here. You're right, Alex will be fine and I'll be fine on my own."

"No. You and Alex are here in the city alone. And we're friends…" Joss punctuated the words friends as she looked at John. "I'm staying."

"We both are." John smirked after he released the words.

Ian sank back into the sofa. Joss patted his hand before standing. "Excuse us for a second, Ian. I want to talk to John."

John and Joss walked just outside of the waiting room. Joss took a deep breath in order to remain calm. She knew that she and John were coming off of a bad week and she knew how he felt about Ian. Still, she was only trying to help a friend and she wanted John to trust her.

"John, what are you doing here?"

John smiled. "I'm just making sure you're safe."

"Safe from what? Ian?" She shook her head.

"He's a tie to your past. You never know who might be following him…especially since he followed you to Chicago and is seemingly refusing to go back home."

Joss started to laugh. "Oh my gosh, John, you're jealous. You're so jealous that you can hardly stand it."

John suddenly felt a bit irritated that Joss thought his reaction to her rushing to Ian's side was humorous. "Joss, this is not about jealousy, this is about your safety. You ran off with a man, who when we met him, we weren't sure we could trust him. And you did this despite the fact that your son is waiting to spend time with you." John knew this was a low blow, but Joss needed to remember where her responsibilities lay. "You took a taxi, so you have no way to get out of here quickly if you need. And we both know, Ian is not capable of protecting you."

Joss smirked as John's jealousy reared its head once more. "I think I'm pretty good at protecting myself. And what about Taylor? You left him alone in a strange city."

John smirked. "He's with Bear…who's tougher than Ian."

Joss smiled and took John's hands in hers. "Admit it John, this isn't about my safety or witness protection. Like I said, you're jealous of Ian. You have no reason to be. I love you. I want to be with you. Ian is a friend who is very worried about his little boy and your death stares aren't helping."

"Would you be so understanding if the shoe was on the other foot? What if it was Zoe who had a sick child in the hospital? Would you want me to be glued to her side?"

Joss felt the hair at the back of her neck stand up. She wouldn't give John the satisfaction of an angry response. "I doubt that a piranha like Zoe would want to spawn any children, but if she did, I would understand you offering your friendship." She looked at the way John was smirking. Perhaps she hadn't sounded as disinterested as she had intended. "Do me a favor, go get us all some food. By the time we finish eating, Alex's surgery will be finished and we can go home."

"Home. I like the sound of that." He bent to give her a quick peck on the cheek. "Fine, but Murphy better watch himself."

"John, go." She poked him in the stomach and then turned to head into the waiting room. She took a seat next to Ian. He looked tired. The rumpling of his clothes indicated that this had been a long day for him.

Ian looked at her, started to speak and then just shook his head. A minute or so later her started to laugh.

"What?"

"I was just thinking that if you had only indicated that you wanted a guy that acted like a pit bull in your dating profile, I wouldn't have tried so hard to be charming."

Joss smiled. She knew John could be intense, but she loved his intensity. It made him who he was. "Ian, I love him."

"I'm guessing you loved him before Chicago." Ian frowned a little bit.

"Yes, not that I can admit that to anyone except you, John and my son. That's kind of ironic." She dropped her head. She felt as tired as Ian looked. Even though the hospital was nice, new, state of the art, it wasn't home and there was nothing she wanted more than to get some rest in her own bed.

"Can I give you a piece of advice?" Ian searched her eyes to see if she would hear him. "Embrace your new life. You are so happy that you are practically glowing. I hate that it's Mr. Tall, Dark and Menacing that makes you this happy, but since he does, I guess I'll have to throw in the towel."

Maybe she didn't look as tired as she felt. "Well, Ian that's very honorable of you." Joss winked at him.

"No, it's just safer." The two both began to laugh.

John walked in with bags of sandwiches, chips, cookies and drinks from a local restaurant. Ian thanked John but was unable to eat more than a few bites as he continued to worry Alex. Even John attempted to make small talk.

Alex's doctor came out a short time later and informed all three that Alex would be just fine. He should be back to normal in a few days. Figuring that she had tempted fate long enough by having John and Ian in the same room, Joss stood to get ready to leave.

Ian spoke first. "Joss, thank you for waiting with me. I really appreciate it." He turned to John. "Thank you as well, John. I appreciate the dinner."

"Don't mention it." John hoped Ian got the message that Joss was off the market, but just in case he didn't, John decided he would help him understand once and for all. "In fact, if you and Alex are free on Saturday, you should feel free to stop by our house. Joss and I are having a BBQ."

"Yeah, uh, I'll think about it."

As John and Joss walked into the elevator, Joss squeezed his hand. "Inviting Ian to _your _house was above and beyond the call of duty."

"Joss, it's our house…or it will be eventually and trust me, I'm more than happy to have your friend over."

Joss looked at John curiously. He was up to something. Joss just wondered what.


	15. Chapter 15

This one is mostly fluff. But next chapter they will deal with Quinn's trial loving over Joss's head as well as some other precarious events. But for now, I hope you enjoy the fluff!

**Love Undercover 14**

Joss eyed John curiously as he moved about his closet. He'd always paid close attention to the way he dressed when he was the man in the suit. And he was a nice dresser even as John the professor, but today he'd changed shirts three times. He finally settled on a light blue polo shirt and khaki pants.

Then after cooking breakfast for her and Taylor, John was curiously silent. Most of his answers were monosyllabic. What was even stranger was the way he needed to take a moment to look into her eyes and say, "I love you," before he left. She wondered if her being at the hospital with Ian had taken a greater toll on John than she thought.

"Tay, did John seem ok to you this morning?"

"Yeah." Taylor seemed oblivious to it all; he wasn't. John had asked for his mom's hand in marriage the previous evening, which Taylor thought was pretty cool. He readily gave him his blessing. Taylor knew that John was off searching for the perfect ring to propose to his mom…not that he could tell her that.

"He didn't seem quiet to you?" Joss prodded further.

Taylor began to laugh out loud. "Did John seem quiet? Compared to what? John is normally so quiet that he's two steps away from being a mime."

Joss poked him in the arm. It was so nice to have her boy in town with her. He'd always had a dry sense of humor and she'd missed it. "So, what do you want to do today, Tay? School shopping on Michigan Avenue? Walk around Millennium Park?"

Taylor shook his head and fought back a chuckle. Leave it to his mom to suggest hanging out two blocks from where John was shopping for her engagement ring with her coworkers. If she spotted the three of them together, there would be no explaining anything. "Let's go to a Cubs game. "

"OK. There are some great restaurants we can check out for lunch before the game."

"I'll go get showered." He kissed her on the cheek. "I missed you so much, Mom."

"I missed you too, Baby."

John breathed deeply as he hopped on the el train to head downtown. What was wrong with him? He was a former CIA operative who had been trained to withstand torture to keep his Country's secrets. And yet, a few glances in Jocelyn's deep chocolate eyes and he had almost spilled his guts. In fact, if he'd had the ring this morning, he probably would have already proposed.

Getting out of the house was good. It felt more like a mission. He and his two new partners were going to find the love of his life the perfect ring to seal his promise to be hers forever. They had a meeting spot: Millennium Park. Each would be arriving separately. Lena had said she'd taken a day off to help her brother-in-law on a special project, something she considered to be the truth. Natalie planned to come down with an asthma attack that would leave her exhausted and force her to leave the office. If they had simply told the truth about both being off on the same day, someone could inadvertently tip Joss off and peak her detective's curiosity.

John looked at his image in the distorted metal of the giant jellybean sculpture near the entrance of the park. He noticed his now trademark glasses, slightly longer hair and the five o'clock shadow he often wore. He looked different…not because of the cosmetic changes or because his reflection was distorted so that his forehead was wide and his chin was narrow, but because he was happy. John was happier than he had ever been in his life.

"Is that the sexiest man in Chicago?" John smiled wider as he heard Natalie's voice. He turned in time to see her approaching.

"It sure is." Lena replied coming from the other direction. "And he's really looking mighty fine today."

John blushed. Inwardly, he cheered. He'd once heard Joss and the other ladies talking about how horribly a man in their office dressed. Lena said that she blamed his wife. A good woman wouldn't let her man go out in the street looking a mess. And while, poor dressing had never been a concern of his before, he never had to worry about wearing anything but suits and Joss's credibility as a good partner had never been on the line either. "Good morning ladies. I'm just trying to keep up with the two of you."

John didn't see the two women mentally swoon, but they did. Natalie said a small prayer that she would find someone that had half going on that John did. Lena made a mental note to tell her husband to get it together when she got home.

The trio began their walk toward Chicago's infamous diamond district. As they walked, the ladies decided to see if John knew what he was looking for.

"So John, do you know what shape of stone you are looking for?" Lena asked.

Of course, he knew what he wanted: a 2.5 carat Asscher-cut diamond, D color, IF or VVS clarity. He thought an antique setting would best suit Joss's long, slender fingers and platinum would most compliment the jewelry she wore most often. Of course, if he stated this outright, they would want to know how or why he knew so much about diamonds. So, instead, he just smirked and said, "Something beautiful and classy like Jocelyn. I think I'll know it when I see." This time John saw Joss's two friends swoon.

The first store they went into got them off to a bumpy start. First, the younger sales woman spent more time trying to flirt with John than she did trying to make the engagement ring sale. At least that was until Lena told her she should "check herself before she wrecked herself." When the girl acted offended, Lena told her that she was John's fiancée and that she couldn't believe how rudely she'd acted.

The girl's response didn't help matters much. She turned up her nose and shrieked, "You're his fiancée?"

Lena snapped, "Yeah, trick. You got a problem with that?" She placed her wedding band-clad hand in the air to silence the girl.

John almost burst out laughing but instead grabbed Lena's hand. "Um, honey, let's just go."

"But, I want to see the manager—"

John looked helplessly at Natalie who walked up to Lena and said, "Yeah, we should go."

The sales clerk still hadn't caught a hint. "Well, if you're his fiancée, who is she?" She looked in Natalie's direction.

"I'm the sister-wife and you're a moron." Natalie smirked.

And with that all three walked out of the store. The trio were barely around the corner when they broke into laughter. John now knew how Joss had been able to form friendships with these women so fast. They were a lot of fun. Maybe Joss would have twins so that each one could be a godparent to their children. He laughed at what he knew would be Joss's reaction to his thought.

"What's so funny, handsome?" Nat teased him.

"I was just thinking that you and Lena are great. I'm really glad Joss has friends like you." He smiled before laughing out loud. "Sister-wife, too funny."

At the fourth jewelry store, they hit pay dirt. There, a sexy clerk named Ryan helped them. He not only wound up with a sale, but with Natalie's phone number too. Ryan was also kind enough to keep the cost of the ring a private matter between the two of them, even though Nat and Lena very much wanted to know what he'd spent.

John wound up with a 3.0 carat Asscher cut diamond that was flanked by "bullet-shaped" diamond accents on each side. He knew it would take Joss's breath away. It would be custom made and the jeweler assured him it would be done well before the party. He smiled as he thought of the look on Joss's face when it happened. First, she'd be speechless, then she he spent too much, then she'd say yes. She'd fight back tears because she would be doing her best to be tough.

The week progressed excruciatingly slow for John. All he wanted was for Saturday to come so that he could show Joss how he felt about her. Unfortunately, in the days leading up to Saturday, he had been short with her, maybe even a bit snippy.

Thursday and Friday were the worst because he was supposed to have the ring in his possession. There had been a hiccup with the setting. The jeweler wanted perfection, as did John, so there would be a delay. John could understand the man's perfectionist spirit; he was a perfectionist himself. Still, it didn't keep John from making almost hourly calls to the jeweler to find out just when he would be done.

Those same hourly calls were making Joss suspicious. She knew John wasn't a man to cheat. So, there could only be one conclusion: he was going back to the numbers. She knew this was going to happen. It was why she didn't want him to make her promises he couldn't keep when they first started dating.

John's disappearance on Saturday morning didn't help things. He wasn't in his trademark suit, but he still wore khakis and a nice button down. She wondered if he was already working a number. If so, did he plan to keep working them from Chicago? She could live with that; although, it might make her reconsider bringing a baby into the world with that kind of danger.

When John got home, from wherever he had been, he went straight to the kitchen and began prepping food for the afternoon's party. She had so many questions for him but once again, he didn't seem to feel like talking. Normally, she would have pushed, but she didn't want to get into a fight before the party, especially because John hated parties…or at least, she thought he did.

So, she decided not to worry about it, jumped in the shower and got dressed. She slipped into a coral midi-dress, piled her hair up into a messy bun and then headed back to the kitchen. She began to cut strawberries for the fruit salad, when the feeling of John's lips on her shoulder surprised her.

"Jocelyn, you know how much I love you don't you?"

She nodded as she fought back tears. It was worse than she had anticipated. He was going to leave her after the party. That was the only thing she could think of to explain the mood swings. She couldn't take it. She was just about to ask him what was going on when the doorbell rang. It was Lena, her husband Todd and Natalie. She showed them to the patio and then quickly departed. These two women knew her well. If she didn't get out of dodge quickly, they'd start asking her questions and she'd break.

Armand and his wife arrived. They were all smiles as Joss introduced them to Taylor. Anthony and Kennedy were the next to arrive, followed by Ian an Alex. These arrivals gave her a much-needed distraction because it seemed that Kennedy fell in love with Alex, the moment she laid eyes on him. Joss noticed that Kennedy was uncharacteristically quiet when she introduced her to Alex. Still, a short time later, Joss felt a tug on her sleeve.

"Miss Taylor, can you hook me up with Alex? He is fine."

Joss hadn't realized John was in earshot until he spoke. "No, she can't hook you up. You're too young to be thinking about anything but school."

"That's not right, Mr. R. You can swirl, but I can't get my swirl on." She walked away shaking her head.

"Jocelyn, please talk some sense into her about school and having the right priorities."

She touched his arm. "John, it's just a harmless crush. Relax a little."

John simply grunted. It was at that moment she realized what it would be like to have a daughter with him. She wondered if that was something that would ever happen.

As the music played and Joss made small talk with the guest, she began to relax and enjoy herself. Natalie and Ian were getting along surprisingly well. All of the ladies fawned of Armando, whose accent seemed to grow a bit thicker and sexier with each cocktail. And much to John's concern, it appeared that Alex seemed to like Kennedy as much as she liked him.

Then, something strange happened. The music stopped and John was leading Joss to the center of the party. He began speaking loudly enough for everyone to hear. He asked them to all pay attention to what he had to say to her. Joss's heart felt like it was going to stop. She wondered if John planned to dump her in front of all of those people.

John took both of Joss's hands and began to speak. "Jocelyn, everyone here know that you saved my life. But I'm not sure they know to what extent. Before you, I was what some people would call a loner. Due to some bad experiences, I had a hard time trusting people. Life taught me that I was better off if I kept people at a distance. Then, just when I had given up hope of ever meeting someone I could trust enough to open my heart to, I met you. You changed things, Jocelyn, you changed me. And I love you."

Joss felt as though her heart was going to beat through her chest. John had just repeated the words he's said to her in the morgue, just before he kissed her for the first time. And he'd said them in front of all of their friends. Tears began to stream down her face. She wondered why he felt the need to make such a public declaration.

John placed his hands on her face and wiped the first few tears from her eyes with his thumbs. He placed a chaste kiss on her mouth, which she returned. Then as Joss watched in disbelief, John lowered himself to one knee and removed the black velvet box from his khakis. He opened the box to reveal a stunning engagement ring that he'd paid way too much for.

Joss felt herself shaking and she watched John in disbelief.

"Jocelyn Marie Taylor, will you marry me?"

And then, she just stood there, frozen unable to speak.

"Girl, if you don't say yes, I will." Lena's voice and the laughter that erupted after she spoke broke Joss from her trance. She chuckled as Todd just shook his head in mock disbelief. And then she focused her attention on the beautiful man before her. The one who had been willing to turn his life upside down, just to love her. She smiled at him.

"Yes, John. I'll marry you."


	16. Chapter 16

_Hi all,_

_It's been a while. Hopefully, you're still interested in our duo. This chapter focuses on one bump before the wedding, but there may be more before or after… I hope you enjoy. –K_

Love Undercover – Chapter 15

John Reagan was feeling a bit winded as he fought his current opponent. It was a feeling he was unaccustomed to. This kid was strong, smart and had some of the fastest reflexes he'd seen in a long time. The crazy thing is this kid wasn't one of his trained CIA recruits; this kid was Anthony, his young friend from the Boys and Girls Clubs. Though he was only 17, he had the skill and agility of a man twice his age.

If John had been a second slower, he'd be sporting a mark on his face. There was no way he was going to let that happen. Joss had warned him not to come home with any scars since their wedding was only six weeks away.

John was surprised that none of their friends were completely shocked that they'd set such a quick wedding date. They 'd set a date to wed on November 22, 2014, the Saturday before Thanksgiving, almost a year to the date he'd been hit by Simmons's bullet. John was rather insistent that they mark the one year anniversary of their near demise with this joyous occasion.

"Watch the face." He smile as he dodged a strike from Anthony.

Anthony smiled before taking another swing. "What's wrong, pretty boy? Afraid of a little bruise?"

"Yes and you should be too. Because my fiancée will take us both out if I ruin our wedding photos." John loved calling Joss his fiancée. The word glided off of his tongue with an ease he'd never dreamed of.

John attempted a strike when he thought the kid was distracted; he wasn't. Instead, Anthony used the miss to maneuver a strike that landed John on his floor on his back. John was glad the gym was relatively empty. He had a reputation as a "bad ass" to protect.

"You ok, old man?" Anthony extended a hand to help John up.

John waived him off. "You got lucky."

"No, I had a good mentor."

"Good answer." John hopped to his feet. The pair stepped out of the boxing ring and began to walk toward the door in a comfortable silence. John was the first to speak. "You seem…motivated today, Anthony. What's going on?"

"My mom's boyfriend's trial date is coming up."

"That's good news, right?" John knew the kid would sleep better once his mother's abusive boyfriend was convicted of domestic battery. In the time since John had known Anthony, this man had beaten Anthony and Kennedy's mother so badly that she'd been hospitalized and they'd stayed with John and Joss. But thankfully, Joss had placed some calls to the State's Attorney and ensured that the man's bond was so high that it was nearly impossible for him to make bail.

"He's still behind bars right?" John wondered if he needed to pay the man a visit.

"Yeah, but we've been here before. Now that Eli is nearing trial, he will get apologetic and nice, just long enough to convince my mom to drop the charges. Two weeks later, we'll be back to the same thing." Anthony released a long burdened sigh.

"Do you think it would help if Joss or I talked to your mom?"

"Maybe."

"Good. Then plan on having her at our house for dinner on Sunday."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\\\/\/\/

A smile quickly spread across John's face as he walked into the kitchen later that evening. Joss was home. She was standing at the kitchen island, chopping vegetables. Her back was to him. Her hair was up in a high bun, which exposed that spot on her neck that acted as a match to her internal fire. She was wearing the red sweater she wore on their first date, coupled with a pair of tight jeans that highlighted her curves. John never dreamed it was possible to love her more than he had in New York, when Simmons had almost killed them. Now, he knew he was wrong. Now, she felt like the very breath he breathed.

With one step, he crossed the kitchen and was standing behind her. He slipped his arms around her waist and placed a kiss at THAT spot at her neck. When she shivered in surprised, he did it again.

She turned to face him. "Well someone came home all hot and bothered," she purred before giving him a tender kiss. Then with a chuckle she added, "which is the same way you left here."

"I just love you, Jocelyn." He kissed her again.

"And I love you, John." He moved to kiss her but she stopped him so that she could do her usual visual check for bruises. "Not so fast." She ran her fingers across the five o'clock shadow that he'd sported since she met him in Chicago. Then she lifted up the frames of his glasses and finally, she titled his head to the side to make sure there was nothing visible on his neck or his collarbone. Finally, she broke into a smile.

"Meet with your approval, Ms. Taylor?"

"For now," she added with a smirk. She ran her fingers through his locks that were slightly longer than they had been in New York.

He kissed her forehead. "Who would have thought you would be such a bridezilla?"

She fake-pouted. "John, I never thought I would be marrying you and I certainly never thought we'd have a ceremony in front of people with pictures I could show. I just want everything to be perfect."

"It will be. I promise Joss." He leaned in for another kiss, only to be interrupted by the sound of a throat clearing.

The throat and the noise associated with it belonged to Taylor. He stood with his hands on his hips shaking his head in mock disgust. "You two are worse than a couple of teenagers."

John smirked. "Speaking of teenagers, aren't you supposed to be in a dorm room?"

"Ha ha." Taylor embraced John before continuing his teasing. "I'm just getting you ready for fatherhood. We kids are always around."

"Fine by me." John extended his fist for a bump, which Taylor gladly gave.

Joss watched the scene, taking in all of her blessings. This was a life she never dreamed she would have…not after she and Paul divorced. And yet, she had this uneasy feeling that it could all be taken away from her. Moments later, her cell phone rang and confirmed her fears.

It was her handler…the witness protection officer assigned to her case…not that she needed one with John around. He'd called to tell her that a date had been set for Quinn's trial: December 8, 2014. She wanted to scream at him. She wanted to tell him that the date was too soon after her impending nuptials. But she simply said, she would be sure to be available.

Joss did her best to remain upbeat but the news weighed on her heavily. John asked several times during the evening if she was ok, but she kept mum until after Taylor had gone back to the dorm. She chose to tell him when they were snuggled on the sofa, watching an episode of Castle.

After telling him about the trial date she looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "John, does this mean our fairytale is over?"

"I won't let it be. Joss, I still promise that you're stuck with me…so is Taylor…and Anthony and Kennedy. Just think of the trial and our trip to New York as the worst honeymoon ever."

And just like that John made her laugh. He held her a little tighter and whispered in her ear. "I've got you, baby."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Sunday came and John and Joss got ready to play host for Anthony and Kennedy's mom, Laverne. Laverne was a beautiful brown-skinned woman who looked like a stretched out version of Kennedy. At 5'8," she was quite a bit taller than Joss and a little thicker. Seeing her outside of the hospital, wearing makeup showed her to be simply stunning. Both John and Joss wondered why such a beautiful woman would continue to be involved with a horrible man. To top it all off, Laverne was as pleasant as she was pretty.

She handed Joss a box when she entered their home. Anthony and Kennedy ran straight out back: Anthony to find Taylor and Kennedy to find Ursa. "I wanted to thank you and Mr. Reagan for being so good to my babies…especially when I was in the hospital."

"Laverne, you didn't need to get us anything. We love those kids."

"That's why I needed to bring you something. It's not much."

"I'm sure it's perfect." Joss turned toward the kitchen. "John, Laverne brought us something. Come in when you get a chance so we can open it." Joss turned back to Laverne. "John is just finishing dinner. He'll be out in a second."

Laverne raised an eyebrow. "Girl, he cooks too?"

"He sure does."

"No wonder you locked that down. You go, girl."

Joss laughed. Laverne was definitely Kennedy's mom.

John entered the room and eyed the two laughing women suspiciously. He joined Joss on the sofa. He then watched as Joss opened the box and displayed the most beautiful handmade quilt. There were beautiful pieces of pinks and blues all stitched together in an elaborate pattern.

"Oh my gosh Laverne, did you make this yourself?" Joss gushed in amazement.

"Yeah. I'm hoping to sell them when I have a few more made. I used the fabric from old baby blankets." She pointed to a piece shaped in the form of a heart. "This hot pink was Kennedy's because we knew that girl was a mess early on." Then her fingers moved to a deep blue piece. "And this was Anthony's. It's quiet and solemn like him." Next she pointed to a satiny coral piece. "I even threw in a piece from one of my old nightgowns." She laughed to herself.

Joss marveled at the quilt. She touched the younger woman's arm. "Laverne, we can't keep this. This is something you may want to give to the kids when they get older."

"Please, I have so many of their blankets and old shirts. I have plenty of time to make more. I'm hoping people want to save their kids blankets, shirts, nightgowns and things this way. I want to start a business."

"This is a great idea." Joss whispered, as she ran her fingers over the soft pieces of fabric. "And I just might know someone who is willing to invest."

John nodded. He knew Joss meant Finch. He wasn't sure it was the best idea to have Finch that close to their lives given his re-involvement with the CIA. So he added quickly, "If he doesn't invest. I certainly will."

Laverne wiped the tears that began to well in her eyes. "That means so much. Thank you. I just want to give my kids the kind of life you've exposed them too."

Joss patted her hand. "You will. And John and I are willing to do anything we can to help."

"I really appreciate that."

Joss suddenly smiled brightly. "Laverne, Kennedy means so much to me. Would you mind if she was a flower girl in our wedding?"

"And I could use an usher, if you think Anthony wouldn't mind."

Laverne giggled with glee. "You are going to make these kids' year. I can't wait for your big day!"

John wrapped his arm around Joss's shoulder and gave her a squeeze. "Neither can we."


End file.
